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Emperor Cheng of Han favored Zhao Feiyan, who slandered Ban Jieyu and cursed her, so he interrogated her. She said, "I have heard that life and death are determined by fate, and wealth and honor are determined by heaven. If I cannot be blessed by doing good deeds, what is the hope of doing evil deeds? If the ghosts and gods are knowledgeable, they will not accept the complaints of evildoers; if they are ignorant, what is the point of complaining? So I will not do it."
During the funeral of Gongyi Zhongzi, Tan Gong was exempted. Zhongzi abandoned his grandson and established his son. Tan Gong said, "Where is it? I have never heard of it before." He hurried to Zifu Bozi at the right of the door and said, "Zhongzi abandoned his grandson and established his son. Why?" Bozi said, "Zhongzi is also following the ancient way. In the past, King Wen abandoned Bo Yikao and established King Wu, and Weizi abandoned his grandson Xu and established Yan. Zhongzi is also following the ancient way."
Zixia asked Confucius, "What should I do if I am the enemy of my parents?" Confucius said, "Sleep on straw and use dry wood as pillow, do not serve in the government, and do not share the world with them; if you meet them in the market, do not fight with them." He said, "What should I do if I am the enemy of my brothers?" Confucius said, "Serve in the government and do not share the country with them; if I am sent by the king, I will not fight with them even if I meet them." He said, "What should I do if I am the enemy of my uncle and brothers?" Confucius said, "If I am not the leader, if the host is capable, I will hold the weapon and accompany them behind."
When Shi Daizhong died, he had no son, but six concubines. He asked for the successor. He said: "Bathing and wearing jade are omens." All five of them bathed and wore jade; Shi Qizi asked: "Who bathes and wears jade when mourning a parent?" No bathing or jade. Shi Qizi said.
Emperor Wen of Wei was jealous of his younger brother, Prince of Rencheng, because he was brave and strong. As they were playing Go and eating dates in the presence of Empress Dowager Bian, Emperor Wen put poison in the stems of the dates. He selected the edible ones and presented them to the king, but the king did not understand and mixed them with other foods. Since he was poisoned, the Queen Mother asked for water to save him. The emperor ordered his attendants to destroy the bottles and jars in advance, and the empress dowager ran barefoot to the well, but there was nothing to draw water from. After a while, he died. He wanted to kill Dong'e again, but the Queen Mother said, "You have killed my Rencheng, so you cannot kill my Dong'e again."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
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