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Yin Zhongjun said: "Kang Bo has not yet learned my wisdom."
In mourning, one should only look at the deceased but not answer; in mourning of the same age, one should answer but not speak; in mourning of the great merit, one should speak but not discuss; in mourning of the minor merit, one should discuss but not enjoy music. This is the expression of grief in speech.
Liu Kun was good at recruiting people but poor at controlling them. Although several thousand people surrendered in one day, the same thing happened to those who fled and scattered. So in the end nothing was built.
Dragon fell, Duke Mu summoned Xianzi and asked him, "It hasn't rained for a long time. I want to punish the young, but what should I do?" He said, "It hasn't rained for a long time, and I want to punish the young, and I'm cruel. Isn't it unacceptable!" "Then I want to punish the witch, but what should I do?" He said, "It hasn't rained, and I look for it with a foolish woman. Isn't it too distant?" "What should I do if I move the market?" He said, "When the emperor dies, the market will be open for seven days; when the princes die, the market will be open for three days. Isn't it okay to move the market for them?" Confucius said, "The people of Wei separate their bodies when they are buried; the people of Lu unite their bodies when they are buried. Good man!"
Those who follow others in mourning should not mourn until their parents are gone. Those who follow others should mourn even when their parents are dead. If a concubine leaves a female ruler, she should not mourn for the female ruler's son. According to etiquette, there is no sacrifice without the king. The crown prince does not lower his wife's parents; his wife is the same as the son of a senior official. If the father is a scholar and the son is the emperor or a prince, then sacrifices are made to the emperor or a prince, and his body is dressed in scholar's clothes. If the father is the emperor or a prince and the son is a scholar, sacrifices are made to the scholar, and his body is dressed in scholar's clothes. If a woman leaves the house when she is in mourning, she should be removed. If she leaves the house before mourning for her parents, she should be mourned for three years. If she leaves the house after mourning, it is over. If she returns without mourning, she should be mourned for a period of time; if she returns after mourning, she should be mourned for a period of time.
Xie's cavalry was in trouble in Anxi, and Lin Daoren went to talk to him, but Xie left at dusk. Someone saw him on the road and asked, "Where are you from?" He replied, "I came out today after a conversation with Xie Xiaoju."
When he descends, he puts on his shoes and sits, and he has countless cups. The etiquette of drinking is not abandoned in the morning and in the evening. When the guest leaves, the host bows and sees him off, and the etiquette is finally completed. I know that he can make the banquet peaceful and not chaotic.
An old friend of Confucius was Yuanrang. When his mother died, Confucius helped her wash the coffin. Yuanrang climbed a tree and said, "It has been a long time since I have trusted music." The song went, "The spotted head of a raccoon, holding the curled hand of a woman." Confucius passed by as someone who did not hear it. The follower said, "Can't you stop?" Confucius said, "I have heard that relatives should not lose their relatives, and the old ones should not lose their old ones."
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