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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
When Ruan Ji's mother died, he enjoyed wine and meat in the presence of King Wen of Jin. Si Li He Zeng was also present and said, "Your Excellency is ruling the world with filial piety, but Ruan Ji is in a state of mourning and is seen drinking and eating meat in front of you. You should exile him overseas to correct the morals." King Wen said, "The successor to the throne is so disgraced, and you cannot share my sorrow. What's the point? Besides, drinking and eating meat when one is ill is a mourning custom!" Ji continued to drink and eat, looking calm.
Taiwei Wang did not associate with Yu Zisong, and Yu Qing did not tolerate him. The king said, "You cannot do what you want." Yu said, "You are my master, and I am your master. I will use my own rules, and you will use your own rules."
General Yu was known to Wang Meizi when he was young. When Yu crossed the river, he sighed to the king and said, "The shelter under his roof makes people forget the cold and heat."
Zhi Daolin, Xu, and Xie Shengde gathered at Wang's house. Xie Gu said to everyone: "Today can be called a gathering of Yan. Time cannot be kept, and this gathering is certainly not going to last long. We should talk and chant together to express our feelings." Xu then asked the host if he had Zhuangzi. Just got an article about fisherman. After thanking him for reading the question, he asked the four people to communicate. Zhi Daoling was the first to compose a poem of about 700 words, which was elegant and brilliant in narration, and outstanding in talent and rhetoric, and was praised by everyone. Then the four people sitting there each expressed their thoughts. Xie asked, "Have you all finished speaking?" They all said, "We have exhausted all our words today." Xie felt that it was difficult to speak, so he explained his thoughts himself in more than ten thousand words, with his talent and elegance. It is difficult for him to do it, but he also tries to be ambitious and contented, and everyone around him is annoyed by it. Zhi said to Xie: "You went there once, so you are doing well again."
The wise man treats others with familiarity and respect, and fears and loves them. Love something and you will know its evil; hate something and you will know its good. Accumulate and be able to disperse, be at peace and be able to move. When faced with wealth, do not be careless in taking it; when faced with danger, do not be careless in avoiding it. Don't seek to win, don't seek to get more points. When in doubt, do not question; be honest and do not boast.
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