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Therefore, the rite of audience is to clarify the righteousness between the monarch and the ministers. The rite of marriage is to make the princes respect each other. The rite of funeral and sacrifice is to clarify the grace of the ministers. The rite of drinking in the village is to clarify the order of the elders and the young. The rite of marriage is to clarify the difference between men and women. Rites are the source of restraint and chaos, just like the source of water in the village. Therefore, those who destroy the old temple because they think it is useless will surely be destroyed by water; those who destroy the old ritual because they think it is useless will surely be destroyed by water.
An old friend of Confucius was Yuanrang. When his mother died, Confucius helped her wash the coffin. Yuanrang climbed a tree and said, "It has been a long time since I have trusted music." The song went, "The spotted head of a raccoon, holding the curled hand of a woman." Confucius passed by as someone who did not hear it. The follower said, "Can't you stop?" Confucius said, "I have heard that relatives should not lose their relatives, and the old ones should not lose their old ones."
Huan Xuan shot, there was a Liu Shen army and Zhou Shen army friends gambling, only less one broke Liu said Zhou said: "You are not broken here, I should attack you."
Zeng Zi asked: "After the wedding ceremony, the money is paid and there is an auspicious day, if the girl's parents die, what should be done?" Confucius said: "The husband sends condolences. If the husband's parents die, the girl's family also sends condolences. Father's death is called father, mother's death is called mother. If parents are not alive, uncle's mother is called. After the husband is buried, the husband's uncle tells the girl: 'So-and-so's son has lost his parents, and cannot be a brother, so-and-so tells the girl.' The girl agrees, but dares not marry. This is rite. The husband is exempted from mourning. The girl's parents send people to invite him, but the husband refuses to accept him, and then he marries her. This is rite. If the girl's parents die, the husband also does the same. "
During the time of Lord Xie, many soldiers fled and most of them escaped to Nantang and boarded the boats. Some people wanted to search for them at a certain time, but Xie Gong refused, saying, "If we don't allow these people to stay, how can we build a capital city?"
If there is a minister who is completely incompetent and has no other skills, and whose heart is at ease, how can he tolerate it? If someone has skills, he will treat them as if they were his own; if someone is a wise man, he will like them in his heart, as if they were coming out of his mouth. If he can really tolerate them, he can protect his descendants and the people, and it is still beneficial! If someone has skills, he will be jealous and hate them; if someone is a wise man, he will oppose them and make them unacceptable: If he can really not tolerate them, he will not be able to protect his descendants and the people, and it is also dangerous! "Only benevolent people can exile them and drive them to the four barbarians, and not let them live with China. This means that only benevolent people can love people and hate people. Seeing the virtuous but not being able to promote them, promoting them but not being able to lead them, is fate; seeing the evil but not being able to retreat, retreating but not being able to stay away, is a mistake. To like what people hate and to hate what people like is to go against people's nature, and the harm will surely come to oneself. Therefore, a gentleman has a great way, and he must be loyal and faithful to gain it, and arrogant and complacent to lose it.
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