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Zeng Zi asked: "What should be done if there is a funeral? What comes first and what comes later?" Confucius said: "In the funeral, the light is first and then the heavy; the offering is first and then the light; it is a ritual. From the beginning to the funeral, there is no offering, and there is no mourning during the funeral; after the funeral, there is an offering, and then say goodbye to the funeral, and then do the funeral. The funeral is first heavy and then light, which is a ritual." Confucius said: "Even if the son of the clan is seventy, there is no one without a mistress; if he is not a son of the clan, it is okay even if he has no mistress."

Youzi and Ziyou stood and saw a young man admiring her. Youzi said to Ziyou, "I don't know why people dance in mourning. I have wanted to leave for a long time. Is it true that the emotion is here?" Ziyou said, "In etiquette, there are those who have subtle emotions, those who have things for a reason, and those who have direct emotions and act directly. This is the way of the barbarians. Etiquette is not like this. When people are happy, they are happy, and when they are happy, they sing. When they sing, they are hesitant. When they are hesitant, they dance. When they dance, they are upset. When they are upset, they are sad. When they are sad, they sigh. When they sigh, they are shy. When they are shy, they dance. , this is called etiquette. When a person dies, this is to hate it, and if you are incompetent, this is to betray it. Therefore, the quilt is made and the bamboo leaves are set, so that people will not hate it. When a person dies, dried meat and salted meat are offered as sacrifices; before the funeral, the person is sent to carry the body; after the funeral, the body is eaten, and no one has ever seen a feast. Since the ancient times, there has never been a place to keep it, so that people will not betray it. Therefore, what you criticize about etiquette is not a criticism of etiquette. "




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