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Zhuge Hong had a good reputation when he was young in the Western Dynasty. He was highly regarded by Wang Yifu and was also compared to Wang by people at the time. Later, he was slandered by his stepmother's clan and accused of being a traitor. When he was about to move far away, his friend Wang Yi-fu and his companions came to the prison cart to say goodbye to him. Hong asked, "Why did the court banish me?" The king said, "They said you were a madman and a rebel." Hong said, "If you are a rebel, you should be killed. Why should a madman be banished?"
Zhang Jiying was unrestrained and was called the Jiangdong Infantryman by his contemporaries. Someone said to him: "You can indulge yourself for a while, but don't you care about your reputation after death?" He replied: "If I have a reputation after death, it is better to have a glass of wine now!"
From benevolence, leading relatives, and going up to the ancestors, it is called light. From righteousness, leading ancestors, and going down to the ancestors, it is called heavy. One is light and the other is heavy, and the meaning is so.
Xi: Xiaoqing is next to Shangqing, Dafu is next to Xiaoqing, and Shi and Shuzi are next to them. When offering to the monarch, the monarch offers a travel reward; then offers to the minister, the minister offers a travel reward; then offers to the Dafu, the Dafu offers a travel reward; then offers to the Shi, the Shi offers a travel reward; then offers to the Shuzi. Zuodou, Sheng
Morality, benevolence and righteousness cannot be achieved without propriety, and teaching and correcting customs cannot be achieved without propriety. When resolving disputes, do not make the decision without proper etiquette. The relationship between the ruler and his subjects, father and son, and brothers cannot be determined without propriety. When an official studies or serves a teacher, he should not be close to him without proper etiquette. When Ban Chao governs the army and takes office to enforce the law, he must act with propriety and dignity. Praying to temples and offering sacrifices to ghosts and gods are not polite, sincere or solemn. Therefore, a gentleman is respectful, frugal, and yielding in order to show courtesy. Parrots can speak, but they are still birds; orangutans can speak, but they are still animals. People nowadays are rude, even if they can speak, don’t they have the heart of beasts? Only animals are so undisciplined that fathers and sons live together. Therefore, the sages created rituals to teach people. Teach people to be polite and know how to distinguish themselves from animals.
The betrothal gift is seven intermediaries for the upper duke, five intermediaries for the marquis and earl, and three intermediaries for the viscount and the man, so as to distinguish the noble from the humble. When introducing and conveying orders, a gentleman dares not question the one he respects, which is the utmost respect. After three concessions, he can convey the order, enter the temple gate after three concessions, reach the steps after three bows, and ascend after three concessions, so as to show respect and humility.
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
Xie Wan was in front of his brother and wanted to get up to ask for the toilet. At that time, Ruan Sikuang was sitting there and said, "I am new to the family, so I am so respectful and rude."
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