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Emperor Xiaowu was very close to and respectful of Wang Guobao and Wang Ya. Ya recommended Wang Xun to the emperor, and the emperor wanted to meet him. Once at night, when he was talking with Guo Bao and Ya, the emperor felt a little drunk and lustful, so he ordered Xun to be called. When he was about to arrive, he heard the soldiers' message. Guo Bao knew that he was inferior to Wang Xun in talent and was afraid of losing his favor, so he said, "Wang Xun is a famous person today. Your Majesty should not see him with wine and women. You can issue another edict." The emperor agreed with his words and thought he was loyal, so he did not see Xun.
When Confucius was at home, Zixia served him. Zixia said, "May I ask what the Book of Songs says: 'The noble and the gentleman are the parents of the people'. How can this be called the parents of the people? ”Confucius said: "The parents of the people must understand the origin of ritual and music, so as to achieve the five ultimates, and practice the three nothings, so as to be able to rule the world. If there is a defeat in the four directions, they must know it first. This is called the parents of the people. ”
Zhuge Hui's eldest daughter married the son of Grand Marshal Yu Liang, and his second daughter married the son of Xuzhou Governor Yang Chen. Liangzi was killed by Su Jun, so he married Jiang Yu instead. Hui'er married Deng You's daughter. At that time, Shangshu Xie asked for his youngest daughter's marriage. Hui then said: "Yang and Deng have been married for generations. The Jiang family takes care of me, and the Yu family takes care of me. I cannot marry Xie Pei'er again." After Hui died, they got married. So Wang Youjun
Respect, prudence, and correctness before treating each other with affection, is the general principle of etiquette, and it is the way to establish the distinction between men and women, and the righteousness of husband and wife. There is a distinction between men and women, and then there is righteousness between husband and wife; there is righteousness between husband and wife, and then there is affection between father and son; there is affection between father and son, and then there is affection between ruler and minister. Correct. Therefore, it is said that the wedding ceremony is the root of etiquette.
When Zigong asked about mourning, Confucius said, "Respect is the best, grief is the next, and thinness is the worst. The color of the face reflects the feelings; the sorrowful expression reflects the clothes." When asked about the mourning of brothers, Confucius said, "The mourning of brothers is recorded in the books and strategies. "A gentleman does not take away the mourning of others, nor should he take away his own mourning. Confucius said: "Shaolian and Dalian are good at mourning. They do not get tired for three days and do not stop for three months. They are sad for a long time and worried for three years. They are the sons of Dongyi. ”
Zhou Shuzhi was appointed as the prefect of Jinling, and Zhou Hou and Zhong Zhi went to say goodbye to him. As Shuzhi was about to leave, he couldn't stop crying. Zhong Zhi was angry and said, "She is a woman, and she is crying when she says goodbye to you!" Then he left. The Duke of Zhou stayed alone, drank with him and talked with him. Before leaving, he wept and stroked his back, saying, "Take good care of yourself."
If it is abolished, there will be chaos. Therefore, if the ritual of marriage is abolished, the relationship between husband and wife will be difficult, and there will be many crimes of adultery and perversion. If the ritual of drinking in the village is abolished, the order of seniority will be lost, and there will be many cases of fighting. If the ritual of funeral and sacrifice is abolished, the grace of ministers will be weak, and there will be many people who forget their lives. If the ritual of marriage is abolished, the position of the monarch and the minister will be lost, the princes will do evil, and the failure of rebellion and aggression will arise.
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