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Eat for three days, bathe for three months, and practice after a period of time, so that destruction does not destroy nature, and death does not hurt life. Mourning does not exceed three years, and mourning clothes do not repair, and graves are not built; on auspicious days, white harps are played to inform the people of the end; this is a rule of moderation. From serving the father to serving the mother, and love the same. There is no two suns in the sky, no two kings on earth, no two rulers in a country, no two masters in a family, and they are all governed by one. Therefore, when the father is alive, the mother should mourn for the same period of mourning, which shows that there is no two masters.
銆銆When Fan Xuan was eight years old, he was picking vegetables in the back garden and accidentally injured his finger and started crying loudly. Someone asked, "Are you in pain?" He replied, "It's not pain, I just dare not damage my body or hair, that's why I'm crying!" Xuan Jie was a frugal person, so when Han Yuzhang gave him a hundred pieces of silk, he refused to accept them. He reduced the amount by fifty pieces, but still refused to accept it. In this way, he reduced it by half, until it reached one horse, but he never accepted it again. The Queen of Han was riding in the same carriage with Fan. The Queen cut two feet of flesh in the carriage and gave it to Fan, saying, "Would anyone rather let his wife be without a scarf?" Fan laughed and accepted it.
There is a great way to make money. There are many people who make it, but few who consume it. Those who work hard and those who spend it are comfortable, then the money will always be enough. The benevolent use money to improve themselves, and the unkind use themselves to make money. There has never been a person who likes benevolence but does not like righteousness, there has never been a person who likes righteousness but does not complete his work, and there has never been a person whose treasury is not his own money. Meng Xianzi said: "He who keeps horses and chariots does not care about chickens and pigs; a family that cuts ice does not keep cattle and sheep; a family with a hundred chariots does not keep ministers who collect money. It is better to have ministers who steal than to have ministers who collect money. "This means that a country does not regard profit as profit, but regards righteousness as profit. Those who govern a country and pursue financial gain must be mean people. They are good people, but mean people are good people. Disasters come together. Even if there are good people, there is nothing they can do! This is to say that a country does not take profit as profit, but takes righteousness as profit.
Jia Chong's wife, Li, wrote a set of instructions for girls, which were circulated in the world. The daughter of Li, the wife of King Xian of Qi, and the daughter of Guo, the empress of Emperor Hui. After Chong died, Li and Guo's daughters each wanted to be buried together with their mother, but they could not decide for years. After Empress Jia was deposed, Lady Li was enshrined in the royal family and the burial was decided.
Wang Changshi and Xie Renzu were both Wang Gongyuan. The Chief Secretary said, "Yuan Xie can perform a unique dance." Xie then started to dance, his mind and body completely relaxed. The prince looked at it carefully and said to the guest, "It makes people miss Anfeng."
Yin Zhongkan was well versed in profound theories, and people said that he had studied them. Yin then sighed and said, "If I could understand the four books, I would not be able to finish them."
It is said that to govern a country, you must first manage your family. There is no one who cannot teach his family but can teach others. Therefore, a gentleman does not leave home but teaches the country. Filial piety is the way to serve the king; respect for elders is the way to serve the elders; kindness is the way to lead the people. "Kang Gao" said: "It is like protecting a baby. "If you seek it with a sincere heart, even if you don't get it, you won't be far away. There has never been anyone who learned to raise a child before getting married. If one family is benevolent, the whole country will be benevolent; if one family is courteous, the whole country will be courteous; if one person is greedy and violent, the whole country will be in chaos. The mechanism is like this. This is what is meant by one word ruining things, and one person establishing a country. Yao and Shun led the world with benevolence, and the people followed them. Jie and Zhou led the world with violence, and the people followed them. What they ordered was contrary to what the people liked, and the people did not follow them. Therefore, a gentleman should have it in himself before seeking it in others, and not have it in himself before criticizing others. There has never been anyone who can persuade others with what he does not forgive. Therefore, governing a country starts with managing his family. The Book of Songs says, "The peach tree is young and tender, and its leaves are dense. The daughter is married, and she is a good wife." Only when she is a good wife can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Be a good brother and a good younger brother." Only when she is a good brother and a good younger brother can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Its etiquette is not wrong, and it is right for the four countries. 鈥 He who is a father, son, and brother is a model, and then the people can follow it. This is what is meant by governing a country in order to regulate the family.
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