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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
Someone asked Wang Yifu, "What do you think of Shan Juyuan's moral principles? Who is he?" Wang said, "He was unwilling to talk at first, but he did not read Laozi and Zhuangzi, but when I heard their poems, I often agreed with their ideas."
When Zi Liu's mother died, Zi Shuo asked for a feast. Zi Liu asked, "Why?" Zi Shuo said, "Please give porridge to my half brother's mother." Zi Liu said, "How can you bury your mother with porridge for someone else's mother? No." After the funeral, Zi Shuo wanted to use the remaining cloth to prepare the sacrificial utensils. Zi Liu said, "No, I have heard that a gentleman should not stay at home during a funeral. Please arrange for the poor among your brothers." The gentleman said, "If you plan for someone's military advisor, you will die; if you plan for someone's state, you will be destroyed." Gongshu Wenzi ascended to Xiaqiu, and Qu Boyu followed him. Wenzi said, "How happy this hill is. I want to be buried there when I die." Qu Boyu said, "If you are happy, then Yuan will come forward."
Wang Rong said: "The Grand Protector lived in the Zhengshi period, and he was not among those who could speak well. When he spoke to him, his reasoning was clear and far-reaching, and no one could use virtue to cover up his words!"
Zhi Gong loved cranes and lived in Shandong (Shanyin) Mountain. Someone left behind a pair of cranes. Soon, their wings grew large and they were ready to fly. Zhi felt sorry for it, so he clipped its wings. The crane could no longer fly, so it turned its wings and looked down, as if it was disappointed. Lin said: "Since you have the ability to soar into the sky, why would you be willing to be a plaything for people?" He raised the bird and let it fly away after its wings were fully grown.
The linen cap for minor merits should not be changed. If they are exempted, they should wear the same sash as the minor merits, and the sash should be the same as the hemp belt. The hemp for the sash should not be changed to the hemp for minor merits; the hemp for minor merits should not be changed to the hemp for major merits. The tax is based on the original.
In mourning of parents, after the funeral, one should cry for the deceased, eat simple food and drink water, and not eat vegetables and fruits; in the time of the minor auspiciousness, one should eat vegetables and fruits; in the time of the major auspiciousness, one should eat soy sauce; in the middle of the month, one should mourn, and drink sweet wine during the mourning. Those who start drinking should drink sweet wine first. Those who start eating meat should eat dried meat first. In the case of parents' funeral, people live in a lean-to house, sleep on straw and a block of pillow, and do not wear mourning clothes; in the case of mourning of the first mourning period, people live in a whitened room, and do not wear sackcloth or bees; in the case of mourning of the second mourning period, people sleep on mats, and in the case of mourning of the third mourning period, people wear hemp and a bed. This is the way that grief is expressed in the place where one lives.
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