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The prefect of Yingchuan was named Chen Zhonggong. A guest asked Yuan Fang, "What do you think of the governor?" Yuan Fang said, "He is a wise ruler." "What do you think of your master?" He said, "He is a loyal minister and a filial son." The guest said, "The Book of Changes says, 'Two people of one mind can cut through metal; words of one mind are as fragrant as orchids.' How could a wise ruler punish a loyal minister and a filial son?" Yuan Fang said, "What you said is so absurd! So I won't answer you." The guest said, "You are just trying to be respectful so I can't answer you." Yuan Fang said, "In the past, Emperor Gaozong exiled the filial son Xiaoji, Yin Jifu exiled the filial son Boqi, and Dong Zhongshu exiled the filial son Fuqi. Only these three rulers were wise rulers, and only these three sons were loyal ministers and filial sons." The guest left in shame.
Drink: heavy wine, rice wine with clear dregs, millet wine with clear dregs, sorghum wine with clear dregs, or wine with syrup, millet wine, syrup, water, syrup, and wine.
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
When Wei Si Tu Jingzi died, Zixia offered condolences. The host had not yet buried him, so he went there in mourning clothes. Ziyou went to mourn. After the host had buried him, Ziyou came out, wearing mourning clothes and crying. Zixia asked, "Did you hear that?" He said, "I heard from you, Master, that if the host has not changed his clothes, he should not wear mourning clothes." Zengzi said, "Yanzi can be said to know etiquette, and he is respectful." Youruo said, "Yanzi wore the same fox fur coat for thirty years, and sent one carriage to the tomb and returned; the king had seven carriages, and the ministers had five carriages. How could Yanzi know etiquette?" Zengzi said, "If a country is not governed by the Way, a gentleman will be ashamed to be full of etiquette. If the state is extravagant, then show it frugality; if the state is frugal, then show it etiquette.
Wang Youjun had always looked down on Lantian, but Lantian's praise for him increased in his later years, which made Youjun particularly dissatisfied. Lantian was in danger in Kuaiji, so he stopped at Shanyin to hold funerals. Youjun was in charge of the county and repeatedly expressed his condolences, but to no avail. Later he went to the gate and let in. The host was crying, so he did not go forward but left, humiliating him. As a result, a great rift between them arose. Later, Lantian was approaching Yangzhou. The Right Army was still in the county. When he first got the news, he sent a military officer to the court to request that Kuaiji be divided into Yuezhou. However, the messenger disobeyed the imperial order and was laughed at by the wise men of the time. Lantian secretly ordered his men to count all the illegal activities in the county, and since there was already a rift between them, he ordered them to deal with it themselves. Youjun then claimed illness and left the county, and died in indignation.
The king sends a scholar to welcome the guests at the end of the night, and the ministers go to the temple for labor. The king personally greets them at the gate and receives them in the temple, facing north to bow and give gifts, and bow to the humiliation of the king's order, so as to show respect. Respect and humility are the way gentlemen meet each other. Therefore, the princes meet each other with respect and humility, so they will not invade and bully each other.
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