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Jia Chong鈥檚 ex-wife was the daughter of Li Feng. Feng was executed, and the couple divorced and moved to the border. Later he was pardoned and returned, and Chong had already married Guo's daughter. Emperor Wu specially appointed two ladies on his left and right. Li lived separately and refused to return to the residence. Guo said to Chong, "I want to go to Sheng Li." Chong said, "He is a man of integrity and talent. It is better for you not to go." Guo then showed her dignity and brought many maids with her. When he arrived and entered the house, Li stood up to greet him. Guo didn't realize his legs were bent, so he knelt and bowed again. After returning, he told Chong, who asked, "What can I tell you?"
After Ji Zhongsan was executed, Xiang Ziqi reported the county to Luoyang. King Wen of the Zhou Dynasty invited him in and asked, "I heard that you have ambitions to go to Jishan. Why are you here?" Xiang Ziqi replied, "Chao and Xu are both arrogant and servile people. They are not worth admiring." The king was greatly impressed.
Zixia had just finished mourning and came to see me. I played the zither, but it didn't harmonize, and it didn't make any sound when I played it. He stood up and said, "I have not forgotten my grief. The ancient kings established the rites, and I dare not go beyond them."
In ancient times, teachers had private schools at home, schools in the community, and schools in the country. Students entered school at the same age and were examined in the middle of the year. In the first year, they were evaluated for their ability to distinguish between classics and aspirations; in the third year, they were evaluated for their dedication to work and their enjoyment of society; in the fifth year, they were evaluated for their extensive learning and their closeness to their teachers; in the seventh year, they were evaluated for their learning and their friendships. This was called small success; in the ninth year, they were evaluated for their ability to understand the categories and to be able to establish themselves firmly without turning back. This was called great success. Only then could they transform the people and change their customs, convince those who were close to them, and make those who were far away cherish their memory. This was the way of the university. The Records says, "The moths were taught from time to time." Is this what it means?
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
When a gentleman is about to build a palace, the ancestral temple comes first, the stables and storehouses come second, and the living quarters come last. For all household construction, sacrificial utensils come first, sacrificial tribute comes second, and domestic utensils come last. Those without land and salary do not set up sacrificial utensils; those with land and salary first make sacrificial clothes. Even if a gentleman is poor, he does not eat porridge with sacrificial utensils; even if it is cold, he does not wear sacrificial clothes; when building a palace, he does not cut hills and trees. When a senior official or scholar leaves the country, sacrificial utensils are not overused. The senior officials shall leave the sacrificial vessels with the senior officials, and the scholars shall leave the sacrificial vessels with the scholars.
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