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After Jianwen died, Xiaowu, who was more than ten years old at the time, ascended the throne and did not come until nightfall. The left and right sides open with 鈥渞espond as usual鈥. The emperor said: "When grief comes, weep. How can there be a constant?"
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
According to the etiquette of eating, the meat is placed on the left and the stew is placed on the right, the food is placed on the left and the soup is placed on the right. Outside the roasted part, inside the vinegar and sauce part, at the end of the scallion part, and on the right of the wine part. For those who use preserved meat, the left side is the top and the right side is the end. If the guest descends to a lower level and holds the food to say goodbye, the host will say goodbye to the guest, and then the guest will sit down. The host invites the guests to offer a sacrifice: the sacrificial food and the sacrificial objects are presented first. Confusion of order, and offering sacrifices to all. At the third meal, the host invites the guests to eat the meat, and then they debate. If the host does not argue, the guest will not speak in vain.
The meaning of drinking in the village: the host greets the guests outside the school gate, and when they enter, they bow three times before going up the steps, and then give way three times before going up, so as to show respect and courtesy. Wash and raise the cup, so as to show cleanliness. Bowing to arrive, bowing to wash, bowing to receive, bowing to send off, and bowing to end is to show respect. Respect, courtesy, cleanliness and respect are the reasons why gentlemen interact with each other. Gentlemen respect and yield will not argue, and cleanliness and respect will not be rude. If they are not rude and do not argue, they will be far away from fighting and arguing; if they do not fight and argue, there will be no disasters of violence and rebellion. This is why gentlemen are free from human disasters, so the sages regulate it with the Tao.
Wang Changshi was the grandson of Yu Zigong. The Prime Minister said to Zigong: "I am a master of reasoning. I am superior to others."
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