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A woman shall be buried with her great-grandmother. If there are three great-grandmothers, she shall be buried with the close ones. If the wife is a senior official and dies, and then her husband is no longer a senior official, but is buried with her wife, the sacrifice should not be changed; if the wife dies and then the husband is a senior official, and is buried with his wife, the sacrifice should be that of a senior official. A descendant of a father does not wear mourning clothes for his mother. The reason for not wearing mourning clothes is that the mourner does not offer sacrifices. A woman who is not the master and is caned: the aunt is caned for the husband, and the mother is caned for the eldest son. A daughter's son is in the house for the parents, and the master of the mourning does not wear a cane, then the son alone can be caned.
Confucius got up early, put his hands behind his back and dragged his stick, and swayed at the door, singing, "Is Mount Tai collapsing? Is the beam breaking? Is the philosopher withering?" After singing, he went in and sat in front of the door. Zigong heard it and said, "If Mount Tai collapses, where can I look up? If the beam breaks and the philosopher withers, where can I go? Master, I am afraid you will be ill." Then he hurried in. The Master said, "Ci! Why are you so late? The Xia emperor was buried on the east steps, which was like being in the east; the Yin people buried between the two pillars, which meant that they were flanked by the host and the guest; the Zhou people buried on the west steps, which was like being the guest. And I am a Yin person. Last night, I dreamed that I was sitting and lying between the two pillars. If a wise king does not rise, who in the world can respect me? I am about to die." He died after seven days of illness.
It is said that to govern a country, you must first manage your family. There is no one who cannot teach his family but can teach others. Therefore, a gentleman does not leave home but teaches the country. Filial piety is the way to serve the king; respect for elders is the way to serve the elders; kindness is the way to lead the people. "Kang Gao" said: "It is like protecting a baby. "If you seek it with a sincere heart, even if you don't get it, you won't be far away. There has never been anyone who learned to raise a child before getting married. If one family is benevolent, the whole country will be benevolent; if one family is courteous, the whole country will be courteous; if one person is greedy and violent, the whole country will be in chaos. The mechanism is like this. This is what is meant by one word ruining things, and one person establishing a country. Yao and Shun led the world with benevolence, and the people followed them. Jie and Zhou led the world with violence, and the people followed them. What they ordered was contrary to what the people liked, and the people did not follow them. Therefore, a gentleman should have it in himself before seeking it in others, and not have it in himself before criticizing others. There has never been anyone who can persuade others with what he does not forgive. Therefore, governing a country starts with managing his family. The Book of Songs says, "The peach tree is young and tender, and its leaves are dense. The daughter is married, and she is a good wife." Only when she is a good wife can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Be a good brother and a good younger brother." Only when she is a good brother and a good younger brother can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Its etiquette is not wrong, and it is right for the four countries. ” He who is a father, son, and brother is a model, and then the people can follow it. This is what is meant by governing a country in order to regulate the family.
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