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The way of a gentleman is like starting from near when he wants to go far, and starting from low when he wants to climb high. The Book of Songs says: "Wife and wife are in harmony, like playing the harp and the lyre. Brothers are in harmony, and they are happy and indulgent. Be good to your family, and enjoy your wife and money." Confucius said: "Parents are obedient!"
Wang Pingzi wrote to someone, saying of his son: "The morale is improving day by day, which is enough to relieve people's worries."
Zixia said: "The words are great! Beautiful! Magnificent! Is it all that is said?" Confucius said: "Why is it so? The gentleman's clothes still have five rises." Zixia said: "How is it?" Confucius said: "The music without sound, the spirit and will are not violated; the etiquette without form, the dignity and manners are slow; the mourning without clothes, the inner forgiveness is sad. The music without sound, the spirit and will are obtained; the etiquette without form, the dignity and manners are cautious; the mourning without clothes is applied to the four countries. The music without sound, the spirit and will are in accordance with; the etiquette without form, the upper and lower are in harmony; the mourning without clothes, to keep all nations. The music without sound is heard in all directions every day; the ritual without form is heard day by day; the mourning without mourning clothes is pure virtue and wisdom. The music without sound is aroused; the ritual without form is spread to the four seas; the mourning without mourning clothes is spread to Sun Tzu. "
When Wang Wendu was the chief secretary of Duke Huan, Duke Huan asked for a daughter from the king for his son, and the king agreed to ask for a daughter from Lantian. After returning, Lantian missed Wendu very much and still held him on his lap even though he had grown up. Wendu then told Huan that he wanted his daughter's knee. Lantian was furious and pushed Wendu to his knees and said, "What a shame! Wendu is foolish again. Are you afraid of Huan Wen? How can you marry your daughter to him?" Wendu replied, "My family has found a marriage place first." Duke Huan said, "I know it. It's just that your Excellency doesn't want to." Later, Huan's daughter married Wendu's son.
The people of Jin said that Wen Zi knew people. Wen Zi was so withdrawn that he seemed to be unable to wear clothes, and his words were so quiet that they seemed to be out of his mouth. He recommended more than 70 families of officials in charge of the treasury of Jin. He did not make friends with them when he was alive, and did not ask them to be his sons when he died. Shu Zhongpi learned from Zi Liu. When Shu Zhongpi died, his wife was from Lu. She wore mourning clothes and mourning clothes. Shu Zhongyan reported it to him and asked him to wear mourning clothes and mourning clothes, saying, "I also did this when I lost my aunt and sister in the past. I did not prohibit it." He withdrew and asked his wife to wear mourning clothes and mourning clothes.
No one can escape the funeral procession unless they follow the coffin and cry. In all funerals, from minor to major, no bathing is allowed unless there are auspicious signs such as the mourning clothes and the funeral rites. In the case of a funeral of a young man, after the burial, if someone asks to see the deceased, then he can see the deceased; but if no one asks to see the deceased, then he can see the deceased. In the case of a minor funeral, then he can see the deceased if he asks to see the deceased. In the case of a major funeral, then he does not need to hold the coffin. Only in the case of a parent鈥檚 funeral, one does not need to weep and see the deceased. In the case of a three-year funeral, auspicious signs are followed; in the case of a full-term funeral, one cries and follows the deceased鈥檚 funeral; in the case of a nine-month funeral, after the burial, one follows the deceased鈥檚 funeral; in the case of a minor funeral, after the funeral, one follows the deceased鈥檚 funeral. Zeng Shen asked Zeng Zi, 鈥淚s there a fixed sound for crying parents?鈥 Zeng Zi replied, 鈥淎 baby lost its mother on the way, so what fixed sound is there?鈥 鈥
In the case of a funeral, if money and gold are presented to the king, it is said: "Pay the tribute to the officials". The horses are brought into the temple gate; the horses and coins are brought into the temple gate, and the white chariots are not brought into the temple gate. After the person who brings the tribute has given the order, he sits down and leaves it to the king, and the person who sends the tribute lifts it up.
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