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Yu Daoji said: "Although Lian Po and Lin Xiangru have been dead for thousands of years, they are still alive. Although Cao Tu and Li Zhi are still alive, they are as sad as the dead in the underworld. If everyone is like this, they can be ruled by tying ropes, but I am afraid that foxes and raccoons will eat them all."
Tang, all have one virtue. ’ The Book of Songs says: ‘A virtuous man and a gentleman, his manners are not wrong. ’”
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Taoist Lin went to see Mr. Xie. He was a child in Dongyang. He had just recovered from an illness and was not yet able to bear the hard work. After discussing with Mr. Lin, they ended up quarreling with each other. His mother, Lady Wang, listened to it from behind the wall, and then sent another letter ordering him to return, but the Grand Tutor kept him. Mrs. Wang then went out and said, "My new wife suffered a family tragedy when she was young. This child is all I have for my life." She burst into tears and took the child home. Mr. Xie said to his companions, "My sister-in-law's speech was so passionate and impressive that it is worthy of being passed down. I regret that I did not allow the officials to see it."
When Wang Wendu was the chief secretary of Duke Huan, Duke Huan asked for a daughter from the king for his son, and the king agreed to ask for a daughter from Lantian. After returning, Lantian missed Wendu very much and still held him on his lap even though he had grown up. Wendu then told Huan that he wanted his daughter's knee. Lantian was furious and pushed Wendu to his knees and said, "What a shame! Wendu is foolish again. Are you afraid of Huan Wen? How can you marry your daughter to him?" Wendu replied, "My family has found a marriage place first." Duke Huan said, "I know it. It's just that your Excellency doesn't want to." Later, Huan's daughter married Wendu's son.
Therefore, a gentleman should be cautious and not lose his face in front of others. The king should be polite, and the ministers should be inferior to him. The ministers should be polite, and the scholars should be inferior to him. Etiquette should not be given to common people, and punishment should not be given to ministers. Punishers should not be at the king's side.
Zhuge Liang later entered Jin and was appointed Grand Marshal, but he could not be summoned. Because he had a feud with the Jin Dynasty, he always sat with his back to the Luo River. She was an old acquaintance of Emperor Wu, and the emperor wanted to see her but had no way to do so, so he asked Concubine Zhuge to call Liang. When she arrived, the emperor met with the concubine dowager. After the ceremony and when they were drunk, the emperor said, "Do you still remember our childhood friendship?" Liang said, "I cannot bear to see my body covered in charcoal and lacquer. Today I see your holy face again." He burst into tears. The emperor then left in shame and regret.
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