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When Chen Yuanfang lost his father, he cried and mourned until his body became emaciated. His mother felt sorry for him and secretly covered him with a brocade quilt. Guo Linzong came to express his condolences and saw him, and said to him, "You are a talented person in the country, and a role model for the whole country. How can you mourn with a brocade quilt covering you? Confucius said, 'To wear brocade and to eat rice, what good will it do you?' I will not accept it!" He threw away his clothes and left. From then on, no guests came for a hundred days.
The world regarded Yang Lang as "calm and careful in judging the classics." Minister Cai said, "If the court had not been in chaos, Yang would have been the prime minister." Lord Xie said, "Lang is a man of great talent."
The guest must face south. The east is spring, and spring means stupidity, and the one who produces all things is the saint. The south is summer, and summer means borrowing. To nurture, grow, and borrow is benevolence. The west is autumn, and autumn means sorrow. To be sad with time is to observe and keep righteousness. The north is winter, and winter means the middle, and the middle is to hide. Therefore, when the emperor is established, the left is the saint and the right is the benevolent, and the right is the righteousness and the hidden. The host must face east, which is the host and the guest. The host must live in the east, and the east is spring, and spring means stupidity, and the one who produces all things; the host creates it, and the one who produces all things. The moon is formed in three days, and the three months are formed in time. Therefore, there are three concessions in etiquette, and three ministers must be established when a country is established. The three guests are the foundation of politics and education, and the great reference of etiquette.
A gentleman knows the reasons why teaching is flourishing and the reasons why teaching is abolished, and then he can be a teacher. Therefore, the gentleman's teaching is to guide but not to force, to force but not to suppress, and to open but not to reach. If you follow the way but don't force it, you will be harmonious; if you are strong but don't suppress it, you will be easy; if you open but don't reach it, you will think; harmony and ease with thinking can be called good metaphor.
When Ji Wuzi was ill, he went to see him without saying "Qi Sui". He said, "This way of life will soon be lost. Only gentlemen can say Qi Sui in public." Wuzi said, "Isn't that good? Gentlemen should show their modesty." When he was buried, Zeng Dian leaned against his door and sang.
Zi You asked about funeral supplies, and Confucius said, "It is called the family's death." Zi You said, "If there is a death, how can it be prepared?" Confucius said, "If there is a death, don't go too far. If the body is dead, put the head and body together, return to the burial, hang the coffin and seal it, who will criticize it!" Si Shi Ben told Zi You, "Please cover the bed." Zi You said, "Yes." Xianzi heard it and said, "How rude Shu Shi is! He only gives people etiquette."
He Sikong went to Luoyang to respond to the order and became the attendant of the crown prince. Passing through Wuchang Gate, playing the piano on the boat. Zhang Jiying had never met him before, but he heard the clear sound of the strings at Jinchang Pavilion, so he got off the boat to congratulate him and they started talking. Then they got to know each other very well. He asked He, "Where are you going?" He said, "I'm going to Luoyang to respond to orders. It's the right way to go." Zhang said, "I also have things to do in Beijing." Since there was a carriage on the way, he set out with He. He did not tell his family at first, but only found out after his family asked him about it.
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