赵本山同桌的你

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《赵本山同桌的你》

When Confucius passed by the side of Mount Tai, a woman was crying at a grave. Confucius stood up and listened to her. He asked Zilu to ask her, "Your crying seems to be deeply worried." She said, "Yes, my uncle died of a tiger in the past, my husband also died there, and now my son has died there too." The Master asked, "Why don't you leave?" She said, "No harsh government." The Master said, "My boy, you know it. Harsh government is more fierce than a tiger."

Xie Gong said: "The Chief Secretary doesn't say much, but his voice is clear."

After Deng Jingling was dismissed from office, he went to the mountain tomb and met the Grand Marshal Huan Gong. The Duke asked him, "Why have you become thinner?" Deng said, "I feel ashamed of Shuda, and I cannot help but feel resentful for the broken steamer!"

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Cheng's Jiaojiao

Mu Nanzhen

The Grand Tutor Sima said of the two kings: "Xiao Bo is tall and straight, while A Da Luo Luo is clear and unrestrained."

Narcissism is not a disease

Situ Lili

The princes attacked Qin, and Duke Huan of Cao died at the meeting. The princes asked Han to attack. Duke Xiang of Xiang paid court to Jing, and King Kang died. The people of Jing said, "We must ask for an attack." The people of Lu said, "It is not proper." The people of Jing forced them to do so. The witch brushed the coffin first. The people of Jing regretted it. When Duke Cheng of Teng died, he sent Zishu and Jingshu to offer condolences and present the letter. Zifu and Huibo were the intermediaries. When he went to the suburbs, he was afraid of Yibo and did not go in. Huibo said, "It is a matter of politics. You cannot ignore public affairs for the sake of your uncle's private affairs." So he went in. Duke Ai sent people to offer condolences to Li Shang and met him on the road. He made way for him on the road and drew a palace to receive condolences. Zengzi said: "Li Shang is not as knowledgeable as Qi Liang's wife. When Duke Zhuang of Qi attacked Ju in Duo, Qi Liang died there. His wife met his coffin on the road and cried for him. Duke Zhuang sent people to offer condolences. She replied: "If your ministers are not free from guilt, they will be executed in the market and court, and their wives and concubines will be arrested; if your ministers are free from guilt, they will have the shabby house of their ancestors. Your Majesty will not disgrace your fate."

Ridiculous spinning top

Han Nanlei

Zheng Xuan wanted to annotate the Spring and Autumn Annals, but had not yet finished it. On his way, he and Fu Zishen met each other and stayed in a guest house. They had not met before. Fu was in the carriage outside and told him about his annotations. Xuan listened for a long time and found most of the ideas he had. Xuan got on the carriage and said to Fu, "I have wanted to annotate it for a long time, but I haven't finished it yet. From what you said just now, I found that most of your comments are in line with mine. Now I will tell you all my comments." Then he annotated it for Fu.

Deep Sea Love Song

Weisheng Qiuyu

The mourning clothes for the deceased are three liters, and after the mourning period, six liters of cloth and seven liters of cap are given; for the mother, four liters of mourning clothes for the deceased are given, seven liters of cloth and eight liters of cap are given. Remove the hemp and wear kudzu, and wear a three-layered kudzu belt. When the time comes for a minor funeral, wear a lanyard cap with a lanyard, but do not remove the sash. Men remove the head, and women remove the sash. Why do men remove the head? Why do women remove the sash? Men focus on the head, and women focus on the sash. Those who remove the heavy clothes first, and those who change clothes change to the light clothes. When the time comes for a major funeral, wear plain white and linen clothes. In the middle of the month, mourning is performed, and the mourning period is light, and everything is worn.

Qingchuan Danru

Duanmu Xue

A gentleman said: The rites that are close to human nature are not the most extreme. The blood of the suburbs, the fishy offerings of the big feast, three offerings of fire, one offering of the fire. Therefore, a gentleman, in terms of rites, does not create but express his feelings, but has a beginning. Therefore, seven escorts are required to meet each other. Otherwise, it is already sincere. Three refusal and three concessions are required to arrive. Otherwise, it is already frustrated. Therefore, when the people of Lu are going to have an event with the God of Heaven, they must first have an event with the Palace of the God of Heaven; when the people of Jin are going to have an event with the River, they must first have an event with the Pond of E; when the people of Qi are going to have an event with Mount Tai, they must first have an event with the Forest of ... If you want to observe things without following the rites, you will not be able to do so. Therefore, if you do things without following the rites, you will not be respectful. If you speak without following the rites, you will not be trusted. Therefore, it is said: "Rites are the result of things." Therefore, when the ancient kings established rites, they followed the meaning of things according to their wealth. Therefore, when doing great things, you must follow the time of heaven. For morning and evening, you must follow the sun and moon. For high places, you must follow hills. For low places, you must follow rivers and lakes. Therefore, when the weather is right and rain is right, the gentleman will be able to do it. Therefore, the ancient kings valued virtue, respected the way, and appointed the capable; they promoted the virtuous and appointed them, and gathered the people to swear an oath. Therefore, they served the heaven according to the heaven and served the earth according to the earth. They ascended to the middle of the sky according to the famous mountains and worshiped the emperor in the suburbs according to the auspicious land. When they ascended to the middle of the sky, the phoenix descended and the tortoise and dragon came; when they worshiped the emperor in the suburbs, the wind and rain were in season, and the cold and heat were in season. Therefore, the sage stood facing south, and the world was in great order.

Warm marriage with love

Duanmu Shidan

Wang Hun was sitting with his wife, Mrs. Zhong, when they saw Wu Zi passing by the courtyard. Hun said to his wife happily, "It is a relief to have such a son." The wife laughed and said, "If I could be married to a soldier and have a son, it would be no less than this!"

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