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Emperor Ming of Wei asked his younger brother Mao Zeng to sit with Xiahou Xuan, and people at that time said it was "reeds leaning against jade trees."
Zhi Daolin, Xu, and Xie Shengde gathered at Wang's house. Xie Gu said to everyone: "Today can be called a gathering of Yan. Time cannot be kept, and this gathering is certainly not going to last long. We should talk and chant together to express our feelings." Xu then asked the host if he had Zhuangzi. Just got an article about fisherman. After thanking him for reading the question, he asked the four people to communicate. Zhi Daoling was the first to compose a poem of about 700 words, which was elegant and brilliant in narration, and outstanding in talent and rhetoric, and was praised by everyone. Then the four people sitting there each expressed their thoughts. Xie asked, "Have you all finished speaking?" They all said, "We have exhausted all our words today." Xie felt that it was difficult to speak, so he explained his thoughts himself in more than ten thousand words, with his talent and elegance. It is difficult for him to do it, but he also tries to be ambitious and contented, and everyone around him is annoyed by it. Zhi said to Xie: "You went there once, so you are doing well again."
The prefect of Yingchuan was named Chen Zhonggong. A guest asked Yuan Fang, "What do you think of the governor?" Yuan Fang said, "He is a wise ruler." "What do you think of your master?" He said, "He is a loyal minister and a filial son." The guest said, "The Book of Changes says, 'Two people of one mind can cut through metal; words of one mind are as fragrant as orchids.' How could a wise ruler punish a loyal minister and a filial son?" Yuan Fang said, "What you said is so absurd! So I won't answer you." The guest said, "You are just trying to be respectful so I can't answer you." Yuan Fang said, "In the past, Emperor Gaozong exiled the filial son Xiaoji, Yin Jifu exiled the filial son Boqi, and Dong Zhongshu exiled the filial son Fuqi. Only these three rulers were wise rulers, and only these three sons were loyal ministers and filial sons." The guest left in shame.
When Yang Fu died at the age of 31, Huan Xuan wrote to Yang Xin: "You were so virtuous and trusted, but you died of a sudden illness. How can I express my sorrow?"
Xie Gong enjoyed the art with the wise men of the time, and E and Hu'er were sitting there with him. The Duke asked Li Hongdu, "How is your family in Pingyang compared to Le Ling?" Li Hongdu burst into tears and said, "When the King of Zhao usurped the throne, Le Ling personally gave him the seal and ribbon. My late uncle Yazheng was ashamed to be in a chaotic court, so he resorted to drugs. I'm afraid they can't be compared! This is self-evident from the facts, not just my personal opinion." Xie Gong said to Hu Er, "Those who are knowledgeable are not different from others."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
The mourning clothes for the deceased are three liters, and after the mourning period, six liters of cloth and seven liters of cap are given; for the mother, four liters of mourning clothes for the deceased are given, seven liters of cloth and eight liters of cap are given. Remove the hemp and wear kudzu, and wear a three-layered kudzu belt. When the time comes for a minor funeral, wear a lanyard cap with a lanyard, but do not remove the sash. Men remove the head, and women remove the sash. Why do men remove the head? Why do women remove the sash? Men focus on the head, and women focus on the sash. Those who remove the heavy clothes first, and those who change clothes change to the light clothes. When the time comes for a major funeral, wear plain white and linen clothes. In the middle of the month, mourning is performed, and the mourning period is light, and everything is worn.
The host personally invites the guests to the door, and the guests follow him. As for the door, the host bows to the guests and the door, and the guests enter by themselves; the distinction between noble and humble is made. Three bows to the steps, three concessions to the guests, bowing to the door, offering, paying, and refusing are complicated. The door is simple. As for the guests ascending to receive, sitting to offer, standing to drink. No toasts and descending; the distinction between high and low is made.
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