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After the grave is completed, they return home, and dare not enter the room. They live in a lean-to, mourning for their parents outside; they sleep on straw and pillows, mourning for their parents in the ground. Therefore, they cry without time, serve diligently for three years, and their longing for their parents is the will of filial sons and the reality of human nature.
Zhou Ziju often said: "When I don't see Huang Shudu in the moonlight, my stingy heart has revived."
Wang Zhonglang promoted Xu Xuandu as the official of the Ministry of Personnel. Xi Chongxi said, "The king is doing good things, so you can't let Ah Shu sit there."
Ritual is to the right state: it is like a scale to weight, a ruler to straightness, and a compass to squareness. Therefore, if the scale is honestly hung, it cannot be deceived by the weight; if the ruler is honestly laid out, it cannot be deceived by the crookedness; if the rules are honestly set up, it cannot be deceived by the squareness and roundness; a gentleman examines the rites and cannot be accused of treachery. Therefore, those who respect the rites and follow the rites are called the gentlemen with the rules; those who do not respect the rites and do not follow the rites are called the people without the rules. It is the way of respect and yielding. Therefore, when serving the ancestral temple, one is respectful; when entering the court, the noble and the humble have their positions; when living at home, the father and son are close and the brothers are harmonious; when living in the village, the elders and the young are in order. Confucius said: "To settle the state and govern the people, nothing is better than rites." This is what he meant.
The mother of the king is not the lady, so the ministers do not wear clothes. Only the close ministers and the servants and carriages wear clothes, and only the king wears clothes. The duke is a minister and a minister. He wears mourning clothes when he is at home, and he does the same when he goes out. He wears the cap and sash when he is in charge of things. The senior officials are the same. For his wife, he should wear mourning clothes when he goes out, but not when he goes out.
During Bo Gao's funeral, the envoys of the Kong family had not arrived yet, and Ran Zi took the silk bundle and rode a horse to lead them. Confucius said: "Strange! It makes me disloyal to Bo Gao."
Ruan Ji's sister-in-law once came back home, and Ji saw her and said goodbye to her. Or ridicule it. Ji said, "Is the etiquette designed for people like us?"
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