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The way of a gentleman is like starting from near when he wants to go far, and starting from low when he wants to climb high. The Book of Songs says: "Wife and wife are in harmony, like playing the harp and the lyre. Brothers are in harmony, and they are happy and indulgent. Be good to your family, and enjoy your wife and money." Confucius said: "Parents are obedient!"
When Huan Xuanwu died, Huan Nanjun was five years old and the mourning period had just ended. Huan's chariot and cavalry went to see off his former civil and military officials. He pointed to Nanjun and said, "These are all your family's former officials." Xuan responded by weeping loudly, and those around him were moved. The charioteer always looked at his own seat and said, "When Lingbao has grown up, this seat should be returned to him." He loved Ju more than his own son.
The Master said: “The government is not going well, the education is not successful, the rank and salary are not enough to encourage, and the punishment is not enough to shame. Therefore, the superior should not be profane and treat the rank lightly. The Kanggao says: ‘Respect and wisdom are punishment. '"Fu Xing" says: "The spread of punishment is not good. '"
Xie Gong was in Dongshan, and he refused to move despite repeated imperial orders. Later he was appointed Sima of Huan Xuanwu. When he was about to leave for Xinting, all the court officials came out to see him off. Gao Ling was the Zhongcheng at that time, and he also went to visit his ancestor. Before, he had drunk a little, and because he seemed to be drunk, he joked, "You have repeatedly disobeyed the imperial edict and have been staying in seclusion in the East Mountain. People always say to each other, 'If Anshi refuses to come out, what will happen to the people?' Now, what will happen to the people? " Xie smiled but did not answer.
Offering sacrifices and offering wine are respectful etiquette. Eating lungs is a ritual. Spitting wine is a ritual. At the end of the feast, it means that this is the main part of the feast, not just for eating and drinking, but for performing rituals. This is why rituals are valued and money is despised. After the cup is finished, it is placed on the west steps, which means that the feast is not just for eating and drinking. This is the meaning of putting rituals first and money second. If rituals are put first and money second, people will be respectful and yield without fighting.
When Nangong Jiang's wife's aunt died, the Master taught her to wear her hair in a bun, saying, "Don't follow others, don't follow others. The hairpin is made of hazel, one foot long and eight inches in total."
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