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Zengzi said: "At the grave of a friend, there is old grass, but no one should cry."
Wang Zhongzu and Liu Zhenchang went to Yinzhongjun for a talk. After the talk, they were all taken away. Liu said to the king, "The source is really good." The king said, "You have fallen into the clouds and mist."
Huan Xuanwu was not very understanding in talking to Emperor Jianwen. After deposing Haixi, he should explain himself, so he wrote several hundred words in advance to explain his intention to depose and establish the throne. When he saw Jianwen, he burst into tears for dozens of lines. Xuanwu was so ashamed that he could not say a word.
The court talks about dogs and horses. If you stop the court and look back, there will be no unusual events, but there will be unusual concerns. Therefore, if you stop the court and look back, the gentleman calls it firm.
The king does not name the concubines of the ministers, the great officials do not name the nephews and daughters of the ministers, and the scholars do not name the concubines of the family. The son of a lord or a minister dare not call himself "my son"; the son of a minister or a scholar dare not call himself "the heir so-and-so", nor dare to have the same name as the heir. If the lord asks a scholar to shoot and he fails, he should excuse himself on the grounds of illness, saying, "I am worried about carrying firewood." It is not polite to serve a gentleman without looking back.
When floods come, do not offer fish and turtles. If you offer birds, brush their heads; if you keep birds, do not brush them. Those who offer chariots and horses hold the whip and reins, those who offer armor hold the helmet, and those who offer a staff hold the end. Those who offered captives as tribute held their right sleeves. Those who offer millet hold the right contract, and those who offer rice hold the measuring drum. Whoever offers food should hold the sauce. Those who offer land and houses should do so in writing.
When Ruan Bubing lost his mother, Pei Linggong went to offer condolences. Ruan Fang was drunk, sat on the bed with his hair loose, and did not cry. Pei arrived, sat on the ground, cried and mourned, and then left. Someone asked Pei, "In a condolence ceremony, the host cries and the guests perform the rituals. Since Ruan didn't cry, why did you cry?" Pei said, "Ruan is an outsider, so he doesn't respect rituals. We are ordinary people, so we take rituals as our own." People at that time sighed that he had achieved the best of both worlds.
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