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If you are not sitting or standing, do not go to participate; if you are not standing, do not go beyond the middle.
Taishu Guang was very eloquent, and Zhi Zhongzhi was good at calligraphy, and both of them became ministers. Whenever he sat down with the Duke, they would talk extensively, but Zhongzhi could not respond. It is difficult to express my thoughts broadly if I retreat, and I cannot answer if I express my thoughts broadly.
When the king and the official are about to bury the deceased, they should offer condolences in the palace; when they leave, they should order the officials to lead the mourners, but they should stop after three steps. After three times, the king will leave; they should do the same in the morning and at the funeral. Those who are fifty years old and do not have carriages should not cross the border to offer condolences.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Pei Sanqi married the daughter of Taiwei Wang. Three days after the wedding, all the sons-in-law gathered, including the famous scholars of the time and the sons of Wang and Pei. Guo Zixuan was present and started a conversation with Pei. Zixuan is very talented, but our first few friendships were not pleasant. Guo, Chen and Zhang were very powerful. Pei and Xu elaborated on what had been said before. Their logic was very subtle, and everyone present admired and praised them. The king was also surprised and said to the others, "Don't do that, you will be trapped by my son-in-law!"
When a lord is alive, he does not wear jade. He should tie the jade with his left hand and set it with his right hand. When he is at home, he should set it. When he is in the morning, he should tie the jade with his right hand and wear the jade with his right hand. He must wear jade with his belt, except when he is at a funeral. Wearing jade has teeth; a gentleman does not take off jade without reason, and a gentleman compares virtue to jade. The emperor wears white jade and a black ribbon, dukes wear mountain black jade and a red ribbon, officials wear water blue jade and a pure ribbon, the crown prince wears Yu jade and a red ribbon, and scholars wear 瓀玟 and a 缊 ribbon. Confucius wears an elephant ring five inches long and a red ribbon.
Xu Wensi went to meet Gu and Xu, but Gu was already sleeping in the tent. When Xu arrived, they went straight to the corner of the bed and talked together. Afterwards, he called Gu to go with him. Gu ordered his attendants to take the new clothes on the pillow and change them into the ones he was wearing. Xu smiled and said, "Do you have the clothes you brought with you?"
Taifu Xie said to Wang Xiaobo: "Liu Yin is also amazing in his self-knowledge, but he does not claim to be better than the Chief Secretary."
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