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After Deng Jingling was dismissed from office, he went to the mountain tomb and met the Grand Marshal Huan Gong. The Duke asked him, "Why have you become thinner?" Deng said, "I feel ashamed of Shuda, and I cannot help but feel resentful for the broken steamer!"
As a son, you should not live in the main hall, sit in the middle of the seat, walk in the middle of the road, or stand in the middle of the door. Food is not for the sake of abundance, and sacrifice is not for the sake of corpses. Listen to the silent and see the invisible. Do not climb high, do not stand near deep places. Don't criticize carelessly, don't smile carelessly.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
A gentleman is one who is well-informed, strong in knowledge, and humble, and who is kind and not lazy. A gentleman does not exhaust people's favors or exhaust people's loyalty, but maintains friendship.
People at that time said of Ruan Sikuang: "He is not as strong as Youjun in spirit, not as elegant as Zhenchang, not as graceful as Zhongzu, not as thoughtful as Yuanyuan, but he has the beauty of all of them."
When Deva first arrived, he lectured on Abhidharma at Dongting House. When he had just started the lecture, the seat was cut short by half, and Sengmi said, "Everyone has understood it all." He then divided the seat into four parts and those who were interested in Taoism went to the other room to give the lecture themselves. After Deva finished his lecture, Dongting asked the Taoist Fagang, "None of my disciples understood, but how could Amitābha understand? What did he get?" He said, "It is roughly correct, but I may not have understood it in detail."
The dukes have wives, wives, wives, and concubines. The lady calls herself the old woman to the emperor; she calls herself the widowed young monarch to the princes; she calls herself the little boy to her monarch. From the wives below, they call themselves the maid. The son calls himself the name to his parents.
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