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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
When the king marries his eldest son, he should have three carriages; when the duke marries his concubine, he should have one carriage; when the official marries his eldest son, he should have one carriage.
Fu Qian was already well versed in the Spring and Autumn Annals and was about to write a note on it, wanting to refer to similarities and differences. He heard that Cui Lie had gathered his disciples to lecture on the Spring and Autumn Annals, so he hid his name and was hired out to Lie's disciples to work for a living. Whenever he was talking, he would eavesdrop on what was happening behind the door. Knowing that no one can surpass myself, I discuss my strengths and weaknesses with other students. Lie Wen was surprised and didn't know who he was, but he had heard of Qian's name and was suspicious of him. He went there early in the morning, and before he woke up, he called out, "Zi Shen! Zi Shen!" Qian was startled and responded, and they then became friends.
When Confucius was at home, Zixia served him. Zixia said, "May I ask what the Book of Songs says: 'The noble and the gentleman are the parents of the people'. How can this be called the parents of the people? ”Confucius said: "The parents of the people must understand the origin of ritual and music, so as to achieve the five ultimates, and practice the three nothings, so as to be able to rule the world. If there is a defeat in the four directions, they must know it first. This is called the parents of the people. ”
Someone asked, "Why do people bury their parents after three days of death?" The answer is: filial sons are sad and resentful when their parents die, so they crawl on the ground and cry, as if they will be resurrected, how can they be taken away and buried. Therefore, it is said that the funeral is held after three days, in order to wait for the body to be reborn. If the body is not reborn after three days, it is also dead. The filial son's heart will also be weakened; the family plan and clothing can also be completed; the distant relatives can also come. Therefore, the sages made a decision to set a three-day ritual system.
Wang Yifu once was assigned to work by a clan member, but he hadn't done anything for some time. When they were having a feast, Wang Yifu said to the clan member, "You are assigned to work for an elder recently, so how can you not do it?" The clan member got very angry and threw a stick in his face. Yi Fu was speechless. After washing up, he took Prime Minister Wang's arm and was carried away together. He looked in the mirror in the carriage and said to the Prime Minister: "The way you look at me is like looking at an ox's back."
Cai Shuzi said: "Although Han Kangbo has no backbone, he still has a strong character."
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