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When Ruan Guanglu was in Shan, he had a good car and he lent it to everyone who asked for it. Someone wanted to borrow money to bury his mother but did not dare to ask. When Queen Ruan heard this, she sighed and said, "I have a carriage but people are afraid to lend it to me. What's the use of the carriage?" Then she burned it.
When Ruan Bubing lost his mother, Pei Linggong went to offer condolences. Ruan Fang was drunk, sat on the bed with his hair loose, and did not cry. Pei arrived, sat on the ground, cried and mourned, and then left. Someone asked Pei, "In a condolence ceremony, the host cries and the guests perform the rituals. Since Ruan didn't cry, why did you cry?" Pei said, "Ruan is an outsider, so he doesn't respect rituals. We are ordinary people, so we take rituals as our own." People at that time sighed that he had achieved the best of both worlds.
The king's orders, the ministers and scholars follow. In the office, say the official; in the government, say the government; in the treasury, say the treasury; in the court, say the court.
Yanling Jizi went to Qi, and on his way back, his eldest son died and was buried between Yingbo. Confucius said, "Yanling Jizi is a person in Wu who is accustomed to etiquette." He went to see his burial. The pit was not deep enough to reach the spring, and he was buried in the seasonal clothes. After the burial, the seal was sealed, and the pit was covered with wide wheels, so that it was high enough to hide. After the enthronement, he exposed his left arm and returned his right arm to the enthronement and cried three times, saying: "Bone flesh and blood return to the earth, it is destiny. As for the soul and spirit, everything will return, everything will return." Then he left. Confucius said: "Yanling Jizi's understanding of etiquette is in accordance with it!"
The monk Yi was in the Waguun Temple. Wang Gouzi came and talked with him, so the monk asked him to recite the principles. The monk asked the king, "Does a sage have feelings?" The king said, "No." The monk asked again, "Is a sage like a pillar?" The king said, "Like a calculation stick. Although it has no feelings, the one who moves it has feelings." The monk thought, "Who moves the sage?" Gou Zi left without an answer.
The king’s parents and brothers, his uncle, his aunt, and his sister should be tabooed. The son should share the same taboo with his father. The mother’s taboo is taboo in the palace. The wife’s taboo is not mentioned by her side; if she has the same name as her aunt’s brother, she should be tabooed. For those who wear a cap in mourning, even if the mourning period is three years, it is OK. After the cap is worn in the second place, enter the palace to cry and dance, and do three times three times before leaving. For those who have the least merit, they can wear a cap on their sons and marry their sons. For the father, who has the least merit, they can wear a cap on their sons and marry their sons, and can marry their wives. Even if you have done a minor merit, you can wear a cap and marry a wife after you have finished crying; but for those who have done a minor merit, it is not allowed. All caps and mourning clothes should be worn with extravagant sleeves.
Ruan Ji's sister-in-law once came back home, and Ji saw her and said goodbye to her. Or ridicule it. Ji said, "Is the etiquette designed for people like us?"
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