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During the three-year mourning period, one should not speak or answer questions. Lu means in the white room, one should not sit with others. In the white room, one should not enter unless it is the right time to see the mother. The elderly should live in the white room and not in the white room. Lu means strict. Wife should be treated as uncles and aunts, aunts and sisters as brothers, and the eldest, middle and youngest as adults. The mourning period for relatives is exempted, and the mourning period for brothers is exempted. The mother and wife of the king should be treated as brothers. Those who show their color should not eat or drink. Apart from the mourning period, when walking on the road, one should be surprised when seeing someone, and surprised when hearing someone’s name. When visiting the deceased or asking about his illness, one’s color and expression must be different from others. Only after this can one observe the three-year mourning period. The rest should be done in a straightforward manner.
Liu Zhenchang and Wang Zhongzu traveled together, and it was late in the day without any food. An acquaintance invited him to dinner, the food was very sumptuous, but he declined it. Zhong Zu said, "It's just to fill my void, why bother to refuse?" Zhen Chang said, "You can't be friends with villains."
When Zilu's sister died, he could have removed his hairpin, but he didn't. Confucius asked, "Why didn't you remove it?" Zilu said, "I have few brothers and sisters, but I can't bear it." Confucius said, "The previous kings established the rituals, and people on the road can't bear it." Zilu heard about it and removed it.
When Emperor Yuan met Sikong He for the first time, he talked about the current affairs of Wu and asked, "Who is the one who was burned and sawed off by Sun Hao?" Sikong was unable to answer, and Emperor Yuan recalled, "It was He Shao." Sikong shed tears and said, "My father suffered injustice and was deeply hurt. I have no way to respond to the imperial edict." Emperor Yuan felt ashamed and did not go out for three days.
Respect, prudence, and correctness before treating each other with affection, is the general principle of etiquette, and it is the way to establish the distinction between men and women, and the righteousness of husband and wife. There is a distinction between men and women, and then there is righteousness between husband and wife; there is righteousness between husband and wife, and then there is affection between father and son; there is affection between father and son, and then there is affection between ruler and minister. Correct. Therefore, it is said that the wedding ceremony is the root of etiquette.
Aigong ordered to sit down. Confucius said: "Confucian scholars have the best treasures on the table to wait for the invitation, study hard day and night to wait for the question, be loyal and faithful to wait for the promotion, and work hard to wait for the selection. They are like this in their self-reliance.
Xie Wan was appointed as the governor of Yuzhou. He was newly appointed and was about to go to the capital in the west. He was seen off for many days and Xie was exhausted. So Minister Gao went there and sat down with Xie, and asked, "You are now in charge of the provincial governorship and in charge of managing the western borders. How do you govern?" Xie roughly told him his intention. Gao then wrote several hundred words to express his gratitude. Xie then stood up and sat up. After Gao left, Xie chased after him and said, "A'ling has some talent." Therefore, Xie was able to stay until the end.
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