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The betrothal gift is seven intermediaries for the upper duke, five intermediaries for the marquis and earl, and three intermediaries for the viscount and the man, so as to distinguish the noble from the humble. When introducing and conveying orders, a gentleman dares not question the one he respects, which is the utmost respect. After three concessions, he can convey the order, enter the temple gate after three concessions, reach the steps after three bows, and ascend after three concessions, so as to show respect and humility.
Gu Mengzhu once offered wine to Zhou Boren, but Boren refused to accept it. Gu Yinyi persuaded Zhu and said to Zhu, "How can you become a pillar of society just by yourself?" Zhou was delighted and they became confidants.
If the eldest son is given a stick, his son will not take the position with the stick. For a wife, if the parents are alive, do not use a stick, do not bow the head. If the mother is alive, do not bow the head. Bowing the head means bowing in the gift. If you disobey the senior official of the princes, you will not return to wear clothes.
When the emperor mourns for the princes, he wears a crown, a sash, and a black robe; some say: let the officials mourn for him, and do not use music or food. When the emperor mourns, the coffin is covered with a dragon carriage, and an axe is added to the coffin, and the house is covered with paint. This is the emperor's etiquette.
When the Grand Tutor, Prince Donghai, was stationed in Xuchang, he appointed Wang Anqi as the secretary and military officer, and they had a good relationship and respected each other. He ordered the Crown Prince Pi, saying, "The benefits of learning are shallow, while the comfort of the body is profound. It is better to observe the etiquette and manners carefully than to practice them casually. It is better to receive the emperor's will in person than to savor his words. General Wang is the model of human relations, you should learn from him!" Someone said, "General Wang, Zhao and Deng are the models of human relations, you should learn from them!" He was referring to Anqi, Deng Bodao and Zhao Mu. Yuan Hong wrote the Biography of Famous Scholars and mentioned Wang Canjun. Some say that the Zhao family still has this copy.
When Zhou Chu was young, he was fierce and chivalrous, and was feared by his fellow villagers. There was also a dragon in the water of Yixing and a tiger in the mountains. They both violently attacked the common people. The people of Yixing called them the Three Horizons and treated them particularly badly. Some say that he killed the tiger and slashed the dragon, but in fact he hoped that only one of the three would remain. He would stab a tiger to death wherever he went, and then go into the water to kill a dragon. The dragon would sometimes float up and sometimes sink, and he would travel for dozens of miles, staying with it wherever it went. After three days and three nights, everyone in the village believed that the dragon was dead, and they celebrated together. They finally killed the dragon and got out. When I heard the villagers celebrating, I realized that I was suffering from the ills of human nature and I decided to change myself. He went from Wu to look for the two Lu brothers, but Pingyuan was not there. He met Qinghe and told him the whole situation, saying, "I want to change myself, but I have wasted years and will never achieve anything." Qinghe said, "The ancients valued hearing their achievements in the morning rather than dying in the evening. Besides, you still have a good future. Besides, people worry about not having their ambitions established, so why worry about not having a good reputation?" Chu then changed himself and eventually became a loyal minister and a filial son.
When Zilu's sister died, he could have removed his hairpin, but he didn't. Confucius asked, "Why didn't you remove it?" Zilu said, "I have few brothers and sisters, but I can't bear it." Confucius said, "The previous kings established the rituals, and people on the road can't bear it." Zilu heard about it and removed it.
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