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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
Yuan Hu was poor when he was young and once worked as a servant carrying rent for others. Xie Zhenxi was traveling by boat. That night the wind was clear and the moon was bright. He heard the sound of passengers reciting poems on a boat on the river bank, which was quite sentimental. The five-character verse he recited was something he had never heard before, and he could not stop admiring it. He immediately sent someone to interrogate him in detail, and it turned out that it was Yuan himself who was reciting the historical poem he had written. Therefore, they wanted each other and were greatly appreciated.
After Sun Xiu surrendered to the Jin Dynasty, Emperor Wu of Jin treated him with great favor and allowed him to marry his aunt's younger sister, Kuai, and their family was very stable. His wife was jealous and called Xiu a "raccoon". Xiu was very upset and refused to go in again. Kuai deeply regretted his mistake and asked the emperor for help. There was a general amnesty at that time, and all the officials were present. After he left, the emperor kept Xiu alone and said to him calmly, "The world is vast and open, can Madam Kuai follow its example?" Xiu took off his hat and declined, and then they became husband and wife as before.
The Master said: "The virtue of ghosts and gods is so great? You can see them but not see them, you can hear them but not hear them, you can feel things but not miss them, and make people all over the world wear bright and beautiful clothes to carry out sacrifices. It is as if they are above them and on their left and right. The Book of Songs says: 'The thoughts of the gods are beyond measure! How can they be shot!' The subtle is revealed, and the sincerity cannot be concealed."
Therefore, in ancient times, the emperor had a system that the princes offered tribute to the emperor every year, and the emperor tested them in the archery palace. Their appearance was comparable to the ritual, and their etiquette was comparable to the music. If they hit the target more, they could participate in the sacrifice. If their appearance was not comparable to the ritual, and their etiquette was not comparable to the music, and they hit the target less, they could not participate in the sacrifice. If they participated in the sacrifice more, the king would celebrate; if they did not participate in the sacrifice, the king would give way. If there were celebrations, the land would be increased; if there were ways of giving way, the land would be reduced. Therefore, it is said: Archery is for the princes. Therefore, the princes, the rulers and the ministers devote their efforts to archery to learn rituals and music. There has never been a ruler and the ministers who practiced rituals and music and then went into exile.
Zeng Zi asked: "When the king leaves the border, he should be guarded for three years and follow the coffin. When the king dies, what should he do when he enters the palace?" Confucius said: "In the common funeral, the son wears hemp, a hat and a sash, a thin mourning, a thin coat, and a stick. Enter from the gate and ascend from the west steps. If it is a small burial, the son takes off his clothes and follows the coffin, enters from the door and ascends from the east steps. The king, the officials and the scholars are the same." Zeng Zi asked: "After the king's funeral is held, what should he do when he hears about the death of his parents?" Confucius said: "Just do it. After the seal is sealed and he returns, he will not wait for you." Zeng Zi asked: "After the parents' funeral is held, when he arrives on the road and hears about the death of the king, what should he do?" Confucius said: "Just do it. After the enfeoffment, he changed his clothes and went.
Therefore, in ancient times, the emperor selected princes, ministers, officials, and scholars by archery. Archery is a man's business, and therefore it is decorated with rituals and music. According to the history, if you can do it well, there is nothing better than archery to establish virtue, so the sage kings are committed to it.
Wang Ziyou once traveled through Wuzhong and saw a scholar-official's house with some very fine bamboo. The master knew that Ziyou was going to go, so he swept the room and made preparations, and sat in the hearing room waiting for him. The king went straight to the bamboo grove and whistled for a long time. The Lord was disappointed, but still hoped that his message would work, so he wanted to go out. The host was so upset that he ordered his attendants to close the door and not let anyone in. The king gave this as a reward to the host, who stayed to stay, and left happily.
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