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Esquire

A gentleman is usually reserved. A gentleman is ashamed to prepare funeral supplies. A gentleman will not do anything that can be prepared in one or two days. In mourning clothes, the sons of brothers are treated as sons, and they should be welcomed and brought forward; the sisters-in-law and uncles have no mourning clothes, and they should be pushed away; the sisters-in-law and sisters are thin, and some people accept me and treat them well. Eating beside a mourning person, I have never been full.

Four Nights in the Red Mansion

A filial son must think about things in advance when he is about to offer sacrifices; he must prepare things in advance; he must be empty in order to manage them. After the palace is built, the walls and houses are built, and all the things are ready, the husband and wife take a bath together, wear the best clothes and flatter to offer the sacrifices. It is clear and orderly, as if he cannot overcome it or will lose it. Isn't this the deepest filial piety! The offerings and sacrifices are presented, the rituals and music are arranged, and the officials are prepared. Then they are presented with respect and respect. Then they are explained to the gods and spirits, so that they may be worshipped. "Maybe they may be worshipped" is the aspiration of the filial son. When the filial son offers sacrifice, he should be sincere and sincere, trustworthy and trustworthy, respectful and respectful, and ceremonial without going beyond the limit. He must be respectful when he advances and retreats, as if he were obeying orders from his parents, so that he may be ordered. The filial son's sacrifice is understandable. When he stands, he is respectful and humble, when he advances, he is respectful and happy, and when he offers, he is respectful and eager; when he retreats and stands, he is as if he is about to receive an order; when he has finished and retreats, he has a look of respect and courtesy on his face. When the filial son offers sacrifice, if he stands without bowing, he is stubborn; when he advances without happiness, he is distant; when he offers without desire, he does not love; when he retreats and stands, he is not as good as if he were ordered, he is arrogant; when he has finished and retreats, he has no look of respect and courtesy, and he has forgotten his origin. If he offers sacrifice in this way, he has failed. A filial son who has deep love must have a harmonious temperament; a harmonious temperament must have a happy expression; a happy expression must have a gentle expression. A filial son is like holding a jade, like offering a fullness, and is full of it, as if he cannot win, as if he is about to lose it. Sternness, dignity, and solemnity are not the way to serve one's parents, but the way to become an adult.

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