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Xie Wuyi has a rough and strong character. Because they were not getting along well, he went to Wang Lantian and cursed him. Wang stood facing the wall with a serious expression and dared not move for half a day. After Xie left for a long time, he turned around and asked the clerks around him, "Have you left?" They answered, "Already left." Then he sat down again. People at that time admired his impatient nature but his ability to tolerate things.
Ji Zhongsan was about to be executed in the East Market, but his expression remained unchanged. He asked for a zither and played Guangling San. At the end of the piece, he said, "Yuan Xiaoni once asked to learn this song, but I refused. Now Guangling San has been lost!" Three thousand students from the Imperial College wrote a letter to him, asking him to be their teacher, but he was not allowed. King Wen also regretted it.
To think about the constitution and seek the good is enough to be famous, but not enough to move the masses; to follow the virtuous and understand the distant is enough to move the masses, but not enough to transform the people. If a gentleman wants to transform the people and establish customs, he must learn!
In ancient times, teachers had private schools at home, schools in the community, and schools in the country. Students entered school at the same age and were examined in the middle of the year. In the first year, they were evaluated for their ability to distinguish between classics and aspirations; in the third year, they were evaluated for their dedication to work and their enjoyment of society; in the fifth year, they were evaluated for their extensive learning and their closeness to their teachers; in the seventh year, they were evaluated for their learning and their friendships. This was called small success; in the ninth year, they were evaluated for their ability to understand the categories and to be able to establish themselves firmly without turning back. This was called great success. Only then could they transform the people and change their customs, convince those who were close to them, and make those who were far away cherish their memory. This was the way of the university. The Records says, "The moths were taught from time to time." Is this what it means?
Wang Xiuling was once very poor in Dongshan. Tao Hu Nu was the magistrate of Wucheng and sent him a boatload of rice, but he refused to take it. The direct answer was, "If Wang Xiuling is hungry, he should ask Renzu for food instead of Tao Hu Numi."
Wang Situ’s wife, the daughter of Zhong, is the great-granddaughter of Taifu. She is also a talented and virtuous woman. Zhong and Hao were concubines of the Tang Dynasty, and they were close to each other. Zhong does not overshadow Hao because of his nobleness, and Hao does not overshadow Zhong because of his humbleness. In the Donghai family, it is Mrs. Hao’s method. In the Jingling family, the ceremony of Mrs. Fan Zhong.
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
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