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Xun Fengqian and his wife were very close. In winter, when his wife suffered from a fever, he went out to the courtyard to cool himself down, and then used his body to warm the fever. After his wife died, Feng Qian also died young. Therefore he was ridiculed by the world. Feng Qian said: "A woman's virtue is not worth mentioning, her beauty should be the main thing." Pei Ling heard this and said: "This is a matter of excitement, not a statement of great virtue. I hope that future generations will not forget this saying."
In all the etiquette of servants, they must give the servants the reins. If the servant is of a lower rank, then accept it; otherwise, then refuse. If the servant is of a lower rank, then stroke the servant's hand; otherwise, then hold him down. The carriage of guests does not enter the main gate. Women do not stand up to ride. Dogs and horses do not enter the hall. Therefore, gentlemen should wear yellow hair, lower than the rank of ministers, do not gallop when entering the country, and must bow when entering the village.
When Yin Zhongkan was the governor of Jingzhou, there was a flood season and he usually ate only five bowls of food, with no other dishes. When rice grains fell on the plate or table, he would pick them up and eat them. Although we want to lead things, we must do so according to their true nature. I always tell my children, "Don't think that I am giving up my former ambitions because I have been appointed to a provincial post. It is not easy for me to be in this position now. Poverty is the norm for scholars. How can I climb the branch and abandon my roots? You should save it!"
Those who follow others in mourning should not mourn until their parents are gone. Those who follow others should mourn even when their parents are dead. If a concubine leaves a female ruler, she should not mourn for the female ruler's son. According to etiquette, there is no sacrifice without the king. The crown prince does not lower his wife's parents; his wife is the same as the son of a senior official. If the father is a scholar and the son is the emperor or a prince, then sacrifices are made to the emperor or a prince, and his body is dressed in scholar's clothes. If the father is the emperor or a prince and the son is a scholar, sacrifices are made to the scholar, and his body is dressed in scholar's clothes. If a woman leaves the house when she is in mourning, she should be removed. If she leaves the house before mourning for her parents, she should be mourned for three years. If she leaves the house after mourning, it is over. If she returns without mourning, she should be mourned for a period of time; if she returns after mourning, she should be mourned for a period of time.
Xie E respected his elder sister very much, and Zhang Xuan often praised his younger sister, hoping to rival her. There was a man named Jini, who visited the homes of both Zhang and Xie. People ask about its advantages and disadvantages? The answer was: "Mrs. Wang has a relaxed and cheerful demeanor, so she has the air of a forest dweller. Mrs. Gu has a pure heart and a beautiful reflection of her beauty, so she is naturally the beauty of the boudoir."
When a person dies, he should not be idle for three days, and he should not be relieved for three months. He should be sad for three years, and he should be worried for three years - this is the killing of grace. The sage uses killing to control moderation, and this is why mourning lasts for three years. The wise should not go beyond the limit, and the unworthy should not fail to reach the limit. This is the mean of mourning, and it is what the king always does. The Book of Documents says: "Emperor Gaozong was lenient and did not speak for three years." This is good; all kings should follow this ritual. Why is it good for him alone? It is said: Emperor Gaozong was Wu Ding; Wu Ding was a wise king of the Yin Dynasty. He succeeded the throne and was kind and good at mourning. At this time, the Yin Dynasty declined and revived, and rituals were abolished and revived, so he did it well. Because it was good, it was recorded in the book and praised, so he was called Emperor Gaozong. During the three-year mourning, the king did not speak. The Book of Documents says: "Emperor Gaozong was lenient and did not speak for three years." This is what it means. However, those who say "speaking without culture" refer to the ministers.
The Master said: "The lower serves the upper, if the body is not upright and the words are not trustworthy, then the righteousness is not unified, and the actions are not of the same kind. "The Master said: "Words have things and actions have standards; therefore, when alive, the will cannot be taken away, and when dead, the name cannot be taken away. Therefore, a gentleman has much knowledge, and he keeps it; he has many ambitions, and he is close to them; he has profound knowledge, and he practices it briefly. "Jun Chen" says: "In and out, follow your teacher Yu, and all people have the same words. "The Book of Songs says: "The virtuous man and the gentleman, their manners are the same. '"
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