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The Master said, "A gentleman does not use words to exhaust people. Therefore, when the world is governed by the Way, then actions have branches and leaves; when the world is not governed by the Way, then words have branches and leaves. Therefore, when a gentleman is at the side of a mourner and cannot give him a gift, he does not ask what he spends; when a sick person is at the side of a mourner and cannot give him a meal, he does not ask what he wants; when a guest is at a guest's house and cannot provide him with a guest, he does not ask where he stays. Therefore, the reception of a gentleman is like water, while that of a villain is like sweet wine; a gentleman is indifferent to success, while a villain is willing to be ruined. Xiaoya says: "A thief's words are sweet, and chaos is caused by glutinous rice." Confucius said: "A gentleman does not praise others with his words, so the people will be loyal. Therefore, a gentleman asks people if they are cold, then he clothes them; asks people if they are hungry, then he feeds them; praises people's beauty, then he gives them a title. Guofeng says: "The heart is worried, so I will go home and be happy." Confucius said: "If the mouth is good but the deeds are not fulfilled, resentment will come to the body. Therefore, a gentleman would rather have resentment than have a promise. Guofeng says: "Talking and laughing slowly, keeping promises, not thinking about the return; if you don't think about the return, what's the point!" Confucius said: "A gentleman does not get close to people with his appearance; if he is distant in affection but close in appearance, is he a thief who robs houses?" Confucius said: "The feelings should be trustworthy, and the words should be clever. 鈥
He Cidao and Yu Jijian were both prime ministers. When Emperor Cheng died, the successor was not decided yet. He wanted to establish his son as the heir. Yu Ji and the court thought that the foreign invaders were strong and the heir was young, so they established Emperor Kang. When Emperor Kang ascended the throne, he convened a meeting with his ministers and said to He, "Whose advice is it that has enabled me to inherit the great cause today?" He replied, "Your Majesty's ascension to the throne is the result of Yu Bing's achievement, not my effort. If you had followed my humble advice at that time, you would not be able to see the prosperous Ming Dynasty now." The emperor looked ashamed.
Ziyun said: "A country that values 鈥嬧媝eople and despises salary, then the people will yield to him; it values 鈥嬧媠kills and despises vehicles, then the people will develop arts." Therefore, the gentleman is concise in his words, and the villain speaks first.
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