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Bo Gao died in Wei and went to Confucius. Confucius said: "Why should I cry? For my brothers, I cry in the temple; for my father's friends, I cry outside the temple gate; for my teacher, I cry in the bedroom; for my friends, I cry outside the bedroom door; for my acquaintances, I cry in the wild. In the wild, it is already distant; in the bedroom, it is already important. Since You Ci came to see me, I cried to Ci's family." Then he ordered Zigong to be the host and said: "If you come to cry for you, bow to him; if you know that Bo Gao came, don't bow."
Xie Gong said to Wang Xiaobo: "Your family is from Lantian, and the whole body is not subject to the constant human affairs."
When Taifu Xie had not yet come of age and had just left for the west, he went to see Changshi Wang and had a long and clear conversation with him. After he left, Gou Zi asked, "How respectful is Xiangke?" The chief secretary said, "Xiangke is so noisy that he is coming to force people."
All the servants in Zheng Xuan's family were educated. Once he sent a maid to do something that did not please him, so he was about to beat her. As he was about to explain his story, Xuan became angry and ordered someone to drag chopsticks into the mud. After a while, another maid came and asked, "Why are you in the mud?" She replied, "I went to complain and met with his anger."
Confucius said: "I ate at Shao Shi and was full, and Shao Shi fed me with courtesy. When I offered sacrifices, he stood up and said, 'Sparse food is not enough for offerings.' When I ate, he stood up and said, 'Sparse food, I dare not hurt my son.'"
Morality, benevolence and righteousness cannot be achieved without propriety, and teaching and correcting customs cannot be achieved without propriety. When resolving disputes, do not make the decision without proper etiquette. The relationship between the ruler and his subjects, father and son, and brothers cannot be determined without propriety. When an official studies or serves a teacher, he should not be close to him without proper etiquette. When Ban Chao governs the army and takes office to enforce the law, he must act with propriety and dignity. Praying to temples and offering sacrifices to ghosts and gods are not polite, sincere or solemn. Therefore, a gentleman is respectful, frugal, and yielding in order to show courtesy. Parrots can speak, but they are still birds; orangutans can speak, but they are still animals. People nowadays are rude, even if they can speak, don’t they have the heart of beasts? Only animals are so undisciplined that fathers and sons live together. Therefore, the sages created rituals to teach people. Teach people to be polite and know how to distinguish themselves from animals.
Pei Sanqi married the daughter of Taiwei Wang. Three days after the wedding, all the sons-in-law gathered, including the famous scholars of the time and the sons of Wang and Pei. Guo Zixuan was present and started a conversation with Pei. Zixuan is very talented, but our first few friendships were not pleasant. Guo, Chen and Zhang were very powerful. Pei and Xu elaborated on what had been said before. Their logic was very subtle, and everyone present admired and praised them. The king was also surprised and said to the others, "Don't do that, you will be trapped by my son-in-law!"
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