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Xie Taifu said to Anbei: "Seeing him does not make people feel disgusted, but when he leaves the house, he no longer makes people miss him."
Xie Huzi once went up to the roof to smoke rats. Since Hu'er had no way of knowing what his father had done, he heard people say, "Only a fool would do such a thing." Joking about it. The saying of the time is not the only one that can make this mistake. The Taifu realized his ignorance and, following his words, said to Hu'er, "People in the world are slandering Zhonglang for this, and also saying that I was involved in this." Hu'er was upset and stayed at home for a month without going out. The Taifu falsely cited his own mistakes to enlighten others, which can be regarded as moral teaching.
Wang Gong was originally very affectionate with Wang Jianwu, but later they met Yuan Yue, which led to a rift between them. However, whenever I am in a good mood, I miss you. At that time, Gong once went to Xietang in Jingkou for a walk. At that time, the morning dew was flowing and the new tung trees were just beginning to bloom. Gong looked at them and said, "Wang Da is washing himself."
When Emperor Wu of Wei went to fight Yuan Benchu, he was preparing equipment and found dozens of bushels of bamboo strips left over, all several inches long. Everyone said they were unusable, so he ordered them to be burned. Taizu thought about how to use it and said it could be used as a bamboo shield, but he did not make his words public. He sent an envoy to ask the chief clerk Yang Dezuo. He answered immediately, sharing the same thought as the emperor. Everyone was amazed by his eloquence.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
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