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When a girl is betrothed, she is given a tassel; unless there is a serious reason, she will not enter the bride's house. When aunts, sisters, and daughters return home after getting married, brothers should not sit at the same table with them, nor eat from the same utensils with them. Father and son sit at different tables.
The gentleman said: "Gently accept harmony, and accept white; loyal and faithful people can learn etiquette. If there is no loyal and faithful person, etiquette will not be in vain. Therefore, it is precious to get the right person. Confucius said: "Reciting three hundred poems in the Book of Songs is not enough for one offering. The ceremony of one offering is not enough for a great feast. The ceremony of a great feast is not enough for a great group. The great group is ready, but it is not enough for the feast of the emperor." Don't discuss etiquette lightly! Zilu was the chief of Ji's family. Ji's family offered sacrifices at dusk, and when the day was not enough, they continued with candles. Even if there is a strong face and a solemn and respectful heart, they are all tired. The officials limped and leaned to attend the sacrifice, which was a great disrespect. On other days when offering sacrifices, Zilu would be present. The affairs of the inner room would be handled at the door, and the affairs of the hall would be handled at the steps. They would start their activities at dawn and leave at dusk. Confucius heard this and said, "Who says that You doesn't know etiquette?
Therefore, in ancient times, the emperor had a system that the princes offered tribute to the emperor every year, and the emperor tested them in the archery palace. Their appearance was comparable to the ritual, and their etiquette was comparable to the music. If they hit the target more, they could participate in the sacrifice. If their appearance was not comparable to the ritual, and their etiquette was not comparable to the music, and they hit the target less, they could not participate in the sacrifice. If they participated in the sacrifice more, the king would celebrate; if they did not participate in the sacrifice, the king would give way. If there were celebrations, the land would be increased; if there were ways of giving way, the land would be reduced. Therefore, it is said: Archery is for the princes. Therefore, the princes, the rulers and the ministers devote their efforts to archery to learn rituals and music. There has never been a ruler and the ministers who practiced rituals and music and then went into exile.
When Liu Lingyan first entered Luoyang, he saw many famous scholars and sighed, "Wang Yifu is too wise, I respect Le Yanfu, but I don't understand Zhang Maoxian, Zhou Hongwu is good at using his shortcomings, and Du Fangshu is clumsy at using his length."
The great officials of various countries, when entering the emperor's country, call themselves the so-and-so scholar; they call themselves the accompanying minister so-and-so. They call themselves the son outside, and the old man of the widowed monarch in their own country. The envoy calls himself so-and-so. The emperor does not speak out, and the princes do not give names.
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