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It is better to not be in decline than to be inappropriate. One should not sit at the side in mourning, and one should not serve in service for great achievements.
Wang Rong and He Qiao suffered a great death at the same time, and both were praised for their filial piety. The king used chicken bones to support his bed, and cried and prepared gifts. Emperor Wu said to Liu Zhongxiong, "Have you visited Wang and He several times? I heard that He was overly sad and distressed, which made people worried." Zhongxiong said, "Although He Qiao was well-dressed, his spirit was not damaged; although Wang Rong was not well-dressed, he was sad and weak. I think He Qiao was filial when he was alive, and Wang Rong was filial when he died. Your Majesty should not worry about Qiao, but worry about Rong."
Zhongni was at a banquet, and Zi Zhang, Zi Gong, and Yan were there to accompany him. They talked about etiquette. The Master said: “Stop! I will tell you three about etiquette and let you go around with etiquette to cover everything.” Zi Gong crossed the mat and replied: “May I ask how it goes? ”The Master said, “Respect without following the rules of propriety is called wildness; respect without following the rules of propriety is called servility; courage without following the rules of propriety is called rebellion.” The Master said, “Serving others takes away kindness and benevolence.” The Master said, “Master, you are too much; and Shang is not as good as that. Zichan is like the mother of all people, who can feed them but cannot teach them.” Zigong crossed the table and replied, “May I ask what you will do to achieve this middle point?” The Master said, “Ritual! Rituals are used to set the middle point.”
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