搞笑高考古诗

I'm just a scavenger

Female Coroner of the Tang Dynasty

Wang Taiwei asked Meizi, "Why don't you respect your uncle's famous scholars?" Meizi said, "Why are famous scholars lying all day long?"

Only you remain the same

Zhi Daolin, Xu Yuan and others were all at Wangzhai in Kuaiji. Zhi is the master and Xu is the lecturer. The meaning of this passage is the same, and everyone in the audience is disgusted. When Xu sent a difficult question, everyone danced with joy. But we all admire the beauty of the two schools of thought without arguing about their logic.

Do me a favor and be my boyfriend!

Wang Da was an official in the Ministry of Personnel. He once made a draft of an essay. When he was about to submit it to the emperor, Wang Sengmi came and he showed it to him. Seng Mide then changed nearly half of the selections according to his own ideas. Wang Da thought they were very good and rewrote them immediately to present to the king.

Dreaming back to twenty-one years ago

The steward draws water, but does not twist it. He does not go up to the hall until the steps are up. He gives it to the driver. The driver takes a bath: four junior officials carry the quilt, and two drivers bathe. The water for bathing is a basin, the water for pouring is a ladle, the bathing is a gauze towel, and the stroking is a bathing robe, just like other days; the junior officials scratch the feet, and the remaining water is thrown into the pit. When the mother dies, the inner driver carries the quilt and bathes. The steward draws water and gives it to the driver. The driver bathes in the hall - the king bathes in liang, the senior official bathes in millet, and the scholar bathes in liang. The Dian people built a sieve under the west wall, the pottery people brought out the heavy cauldrons, the Guan people received the bath, and then cooked it. The Dian people took the firewood from the northwest of the temple and used it to cook. The Guan people gave the driver a bath, and then he bathed; he used a clay plate for bathing, and a towel for rubbing. As on other days, the small officials cut their hands and beards, wet and washed, and threw them on the ditch. The king set up a big plate to make ice, the senior officials set up a flat plate to make ice, and the scholars used clay plates without ice. They set up a bed and a pillow. One bed was covered, one bed was covered, and another bed was moved to the hall. There were pillows and mats for the king, senior officials, and scholars.

A good wife is hard to find

Confucius said: "To bring death to the dead is unkind and cannot be done; to bring life to the dead is ignorant and cannot be done. Therefore, bamboo cannot be used, tiles cannot taste good, wood cannot be cut, zither and qin are stretched but not level, 竽笙 are complete but not harmonious, there are bells and chimes but no bamboo shoots, which are called Ming vessels, which are divine."