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Confucius said: "How does an archer shoot? How does he listen? He who follows the sound and shoots without missing the target is only a virtuous man! How can an unworthy man hit the target?" The Book of Songs says: "Shoot what he has, in order to pray for your wine." Pray means to ask; to ask for the target and refuse the wine is to refuse the wine. Wine is used to nourish the elderly and to cure illness; to ask for the target and refuse the wine is to refuse nourishment.
When Ruan Bubing lost his mother, Pei Linggong went to offer condolences. Ruan Fang was drunk, sat on the bed with his hair loose, and did not cry. Pei arrived, sat on the ground, cried and mourned, and then left. Someone asked Pei, "In a condolence ceremony, the host cries and the guests perform the rituals. Since Ruan didn't cry, why did you cry?" Pei said, "Ruan is an outsider, so he doesn't respect rituals. We are ordinary people, so we take rituals as our own." People at that time sighed that he had achieved the best of both worlds.
Wang Rong's father Hun had a good reputation and served as the governor of Liangzhou. After Hun died, the nine counties he had ruled over, because of his loyalty and kindness, came together to offer gifts worth several million yuan, but the Rong people refused to accept any of them.
When the dukes met the emperor, they called themselves "minister so-and-so" and "hou so-and-so". When they talked with the people, they called themselves "guaren"; when they were in mourning clothes, they called themselves "shizigu". When they attended sacrifices, they called themselves "filial son so-and-so and hou so-and-so" in the inner court, and "great-grandson so-and-so and hou so-and-so" in the outer court. When they died, they called themselves "hong", and when they came back, they called themselves "so-and-so fu fu yi". When they met the emperor after the burial, it was called "lei jian". When they talked about posthumous titles, it was called "lei".
Bian Wangzhi said: "There are three opposites in Xi Gong's character: he is good at doing things, but he likes to flatter others. This is the first opposite. He is honest and upright, and he makes great plans. This is the second opposite. He likes to read books and hates other people's knowledge. This is the third opposite."
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