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The Master said: “A mean man drowns in water, a gentleman drowns in his mouth, and a great man drowns in the people, all because of what they despise. Water is close to people and drowns them; virtue is easy to get close to but difficult to get close to, so it is easy to drown people; talking is tedious and annoying, easy to speak but difficult to regret, so it is easy to drown people; people are closed to people and have contemptuous hearts, they should be respected but not ignored, so they are easy to drown people. Therefore, a gentleman should not be careless. Taijia said: ‘Do not go beyond your destiny and overturn yourself; if you are afraid of the trap, go and review your measures and you will be released. ’Dui Ming said: ‘Only the mouth causes shame, only armor causes war, only clothes are in the box, and only weapons are used to review one’s body. ’Taijia said: ‘The evil of heaven can be disobeyed; the evil of oneself cannot be avoided. '"Yin Ji" says: "Yin is the one who respects the heaven, and is seen in Xiyi; Xia has an end since Zhou, and Xiang has also ended. '"
The king does not name the concubines of the ministers, the great officials do not name the nephews and daughters of the ministers, and the scholars do not name the concubines of the family. The son of a lord or a minister dare not call himself "my son"; the son of a minister or a scholar dare not call himself "the heir so-and-so", nor dare to have the same name as the heir. If the lord asks a scholar to shoot and he fails, he should excuse himself on the grounds of illness, saying, "I am worried about carrying firewood." It is not polite to serve a gentleman without looking back.
When a senior official came to pay his respects, he would say no. When paying respects to someone, he should not be happy on that day. Women should not go beyond the border to pay respects to someone. On the day of paying respects, they should not drink alcohol or eat meat. When paying respects to a funeral, the person must hold the lead. If they follow the coffin to the grave, they should all hold the rope. When a public official pays respects, there must be someone to bow, even if they are friends or people from the state or village. When paying respects, he should say, "My lord will serve you." The host should say, "Come." When the lord sees the coffin on the road, he must send someone to pay his respects. When a senior official is buried, commoners should not receive his respects. If the brother of the wife's father dies, the son should be the main one, and he should not cry or jump. The husband should enter the room on the right, and have someone stand outside the door to inform the visitors. If they are close to him, he should go in and cry. If the father is alive, he should cry in the wife's room; if they are not the father's descendants, he should cry in other rooms. If there is a funeral, if you hear of the death of a distant brother, you should cry in the side room; if there is no side room, you should cry on the right side of the door; if they are from the same country, you should go to cry.
The Master said: "The lower serves the upper, if the body is not upright and the words are not trustworthy, then the righteousness is not unified, and the actions are not of the same kind. "The Master said: "Words have things and actions have standards; therefore, when alive, the will cannot be taken away, and when dead, the name cannot be taken away. Therefore, a gentleman has much knowledge, and he keeps it; he has many ambitions, and he is close to them; he has profound knowledge, and he practices it briefly. "Jun Chen" says: "In and out, follow your teacher Yu, and all people have the same words. "The Book of Songs says: "The virtuous man and the gentleman, their manners are the same. '"
When the main cup was served, please set up the horses. Each horse was straight to its count. One horse followed two horses to celebrate. The celebration ceremony said, "Three horses are ready, please celebrate more horses." Both the host and the guest said, "Yes." When the main cup was served, please clear the horses.
When Xie Wan went on the northern expedition, he often whistled and sang to show off his superiority, and never tried to comfort his soldiers. Xie Gong loved Wan very much, but he knew that he would definitely fail, so he went with him. Congrong said to Wan: "You are the marshal, you should invite the generals to banquets more often to win their hearts." Wan followed his advice. He summoned all the generals, but none of them said anything. He just pointed at the four people sitting around him and said, "You are all strong soldiers." The generals were very angry. In order to express his gratitude and trust, Mr. Xie personally visited everyone from the captain of the army to the commander-in-chief and expressed his sincere gratitude. When everything went wrong, the army wanted to get rid of him. He then said, "I should become a hermit." So fortunately he was spared.
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