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During the funeral of Zi Zhang, Gong Mingyi wrote a memorial: the red curtain and the red material, and the ants gathered at the four corners, which was a Yin scholar.
Xie Gong once went west with Xie Wan and passed by Wu County. A Wan wanted to go with Wang Tianxu, but the Taifu said, "I'm afraid he won't have to repay you, so he's not interested!" Wan still insisted, but the Taifu refused to change his mind, so Wan went alone. After sitting for a while, the king came in and thanked him with a very pleased look, thinking that he was being treated well. After a long time, he came out with his hair dishevelled, and did not sit down. He still sat on the couch in the middle of the courtyard, drying his hair in the sun, with an arrogant look on his face, and no intention of responding to the conversation. After thanking him, he returned. Before reaching the boat, he called out to the Grand Tutor. An said: "Achi will not do that!"
Respect, prudence, and correctness before treating each other with affection, is the general principle of etiquette, and it is the way to establish the distinction between men and women, and the righteousness of husband and wife. There is a distinction between men and women, and then there is righteousness between husband and wife; there is righteousness between husband and wife, and then there is affection between father and son; there is affection between father and son, and then there is affection between ruler and minister. Correct. Therefore, it is said that the wedding ceremony is the root of etiquette.
Zeng Zi asked: "When the king leaves the border, he should be guarded for three years and follow the coffin. When the king dies, what should he do when he enters the palace?" Confucius said: "In the common funeral, the son wears hemp, a hat and a sash, a thin mourning, a thin coat, and a stick. Enter from the gate and ascend from the west steps. If it is a small burial, the son takes off his clothes and follows the coffin, enters from the door and ascends from the east steps. The king, the officials and the scholars are the same." Zeng Zi asked: "After the king's funeral is held, what should he do when he hears about the death of his parents?" Confucius said: "Just do it. After the seal is sealed and he returns, he will not wait for you." Zeng Zi asked: "After the parents' funeral is held, when he arrives on the road and hears about the death of the king, what should he do?" Confucius said: "Just do it. After the enfeoffment, he changed his clothes and went.
The host personally invites the guests to the door, and the guests follow him. As for the door, the host bows to the guests and the door, and the guests enter by themselves; the distinction between noble and humble is made. Three bows to the steps, three concessions to the guests, bowing to the door, offering, paying, and refusing are complicated. The door is simple. As for the guests ascending to receive, sitting to offer, standing to drink. No toasts and descending; the distinction between high and low is made.
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