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After the Duke of Yin was deposed, Duke Huan said to his people, "When I was young, I rode a bamboo horse with Yuanyuan. I abandoned it, and you took it. Therefore, you should be inferior to me."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Liu Jian served as the deputy governor of Huan Xuanwu, and later as a military officer of the Eastern Cao. He was quite unpopular because of his uprightness. I have listened to the record and was speechless. Xuanwu asked: "Why doesn't Liu Dongcao agree?" He replied: "It cannot be used." Xuanwu did not look surprised.
Ji Zhongsan was about to be executed in the East Market, but his expression remained unchanged. He asked for a zither and played Guangling San. At the end of the piece, he said, "Yuan Xiaoni once asked to learn this song, but I refused. Now Guangling San has been lost!" Three thousand students from the Imperial College wrote a letter to him, asking him to be their teacher, but he was not allowed. King Wen also regretted it.
Therefore, "The Book of Songs" says: "The great-grandson of the marquis family, the four correct ones are all raised; the great officials and the gentlemen, all the common people, small and big, are in the king's place, and they are entertained and arched, and then they are praised." It means that the ruler and the ministers devote their efforts to archery to learn rituals and music, and then they are safe and praised. Therefore, the emperor regulates it, and the princes are responsible for it. This is why the emperor supports the princes, and the soldiers are not used, and the princes are the tools for correcting themselves.
It is the festival of a boy. The black cloth clothes are brocade-edged, the brocade belt, and the button brocade, and the hair is all red brocade. Boys do not wear fur or silk, shoes or silk, and do not wear mourning clothes. Listening to affairs does not require hemp. If there is no business, he will stand to the north of the host and see the teacher enter with others. Those who serve food to the teacher with different titles will offer sacrifices later and eat first. When the guest offers sacrifices, the host declines and says, "It is not enough to offer sacrifices." When the guest eats, the host declines with a sparse. If the host prepares his own sauce, the guest will clean it himself. In a room, one person who is not a guest should clean up. In a meal, one person should clean up. In banquets, women should not clean up. When eating dates, peaches, and plums, do not take the core. When offering melons, throw away the rings in the middle of the food. Those who eat fruits should eat after the gentlemen, and those who light the fire should eat before the gentlemen. In celebrations, do not congratulate unless the king gives gifts. Confucius ate at Ji's house, and did not refuse. He did not eat meat and ate.
Wang Junchong was the Minister of the Chancellery. He wore his official uniform and rode in a carriage. He passed by Huang Gong's wine shop and said to the passengers in the carriage behind him, "I used to drink with Ji Shuye and Ruan Sizong at this wine shop. We also had a trip to the bamboo forest. Since Ji Shuye died young and Ruan Gong passed away, I have been bound by the times. Although this place seems close today, it seems as far away as mountains and rivers."
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