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A gentleman is usually reserved. A gentleman is ashamed to prepare funeral supplies. A gentleman will not do anything that can be prepared in one or two days. In mourning clothes, the sons of brothers are treated as sons, and they should be welcomed and brought forward; the sisters-in-law and uncles have no mourning clothes, and they should be pushed away; the sisters-in-law and sisters are thin, and some people accept me and treat them well. Eating beside a mourning person, I have never been full.
Liu Ling was always indulging in drinking and being unrestrained. Sometimes he would take off his clothes and walk naked in the house, and people would laugh at him. Ling said: "I use the heaven and earth as my building, and my house as my clothes. Why do you want to enter my army?"
The Master said: "The virtue of ghosts and gods is so great? You can see them but not see them, you can hear them but not hear them, you can feel things but not miss them, and make people all over the world wear bright and beautiful clothes to carry out sacrifices. It is as if they are above them and on their left and right. The Book of Songs says: 'The thoughts of the gods are beyond measure! How can they be shot!' The subtle is revealed, and the sincerity cannot be concealed."
If the eldest son is given a stick, his son will not take the position with the stick. For a wife, if the parents are alive, do not use a stick, do not bow the head. If the mother is alive, do not bow the head. Bowing the head means bowing in the gift. If you disobey the senior official of the princes, you will not return to wear clothes.
Yuan Yang once visited Liu Hui, but Hui was sleeping inside and had not yet woken up. Yuan Yin composed a poem to tune it: "The horn pillow is as bright as the silk, and the brocade quilt is as rotten as the long mat." Liu Shang, the daughter of Emperor Ming of Jin, saw the poem and was dissatisfied, saying: "Yuan Yang, a madman left over from the ancient times!"
Li Xin was the fifth son of Mao Zeng. He was pure and chaste and had high ideals, but he was weak and sickly when he was young and refused to marry or take up a career in government. He lived in Linhai, near the tomb of his brother, the Shizhong. Since he had a high reputation, Prime Minister Wang wanted to invite him to a position of honor, so he appointed him as an official in the government. When Xin received the letter, he said with a smile, "Maohong has lent me another cup of wine!"
When Wei Si Tu Jingzi died, Zixia offered condolences. The host had not yet buried him, so he went there in mourning clothes. Ziyou went to mourn. After the host had buried him, Ziyou came out, wearing mourning clothes and crying. Zixia asked, "Did you hear that?" He said, "I heard from you, Master, that if the host has not changed his clothes, he should not wear mourning clothes." Zengzi said, "Yanzi can be said to know etiquette, and he is respectful." Youruo said, "Yanzi wore the same fox fur coat for thirty years, and sent one carriage to the tomb and returned; the king had seven carriages, and the ministers had five carriages. How could Yanzi know etiquette?" Zengzi said, "If a country is not governed by the Way, a gentleman will be ashamed to be full of etiquette. If the state is extravagant, then show it frugality; if the state is frugal, then show it etiquette.
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