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A gentleman knows the reasons why teaching is flourishing and the reasons why teaching is abolished, and then he can be a teacher. Therefore, the gentleman's teaching is to guide but not to force, to force but not to suppress, and to open but not to reach. If you follow the way but don't force it, you will be harmonious; if you are strong but don't suppress it, you will be easy; if you open but don't reach it, you will think; harmony and ease with thinking can be called good metaphor.
Confucius said, "When the princes marry the emperor, they must announce it to the ancestors and offer sacrifices to the gods. They wear the crown and go out to attend the court, and order the priest to announce it to the gods, the ancestral temples, the mountains and rivers. Then they order the five officials of the state to go out and leave on the road. The announcement should be made every five days. If it is more than that, it is not polite. Whenever an announcement is made, sacrificial offerings should be used. The return is the same. When the princes meet, they must announce it to the gods, and wear court clothes and go out to attend the court. Order the priests to report to the mountains and rivers passing by the five temples. Also order the five officials of the state to go out on the road. On the way back, they must personally report to the ancestors. Then order the priests to report to what has been reported before, and then listen to the court and enter.
The betrothal gift is seven intermediaries for the upper duke, five intermediaries for the marquis and earl, and three intermediaries for the viscount and the man, so as to distinguish the noble from the humble. When introducing and conveying orders, a gentleman dares not question the one he respects, which is the utmost respect. After three concessions, he can convey the order, enter the temple gate after three concessions, reach the steps after three bows, and ascend after three concessions, so as to show respect and humility.
The one who is most benevolent has the most heavy mourning; therefore, for a father, he should wear mourning clothes for three years, which is a rule of benevolence. In the governance of the family, grace covers righteousness; in the governance of the family, righteousness cuts off grace. From serving the father to serving the king, and respecting the same, respecting the noble and respecting the elder, this is the greatest righteousness. Therefore, for a king, he should also wear mourning clothes for three years, which is a rule of righteousness.
After Ren Kai lost his power, he no longer disciplined himself. Someone asked He Qiao, "Why did you sit by and watch Yuan Pei fail without helping?" He said, "Yuan Pei is like Beixia Gate, which is about to fall apart. It cannot be supported by a single piece of wood."
Yin Ji was ill and could only see half of the politics. Yin Jingzhou raised an army in Jinyang and went to say goodbye to Ji, shedding tears, and told him about the trouble he had suffered. Ji replied: "My illness will get better soon, I am just worried about your illness!"
After Sun Xiu surrendered to the Jin Dynasty, Emperor Wu of Jin treated him with great favor and allowed him to marry his aunt's younger sister, Kuai, and their family was very stable. His wife was jealous and called Xiu a "raccoon". Xiu was very upset and refused to go in again. Kuai deeply regretted his mistake and asked the emperor for help. There was a general amnesty at that time, and all the officials were present. After he left, the emperor kept Xiu alone and said to him calmly, "The world is vast and open, can Madam Kuai follow its example?" Xiu took off his hat and declined, and then they became husband and wife as before.
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