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When the father is in mourning, the sons in the palace cannot participate in the music. When the mother is in mourning, If the sound is heard, do not play music. If the wife is in mourning, do not play music beside her. When a great achievement is about to come, set aside the zither and the harp. When a small achievement comes, do not stop the music.
Duke Zhuang of Lu and the people of Song fought at Chengqiu. Xian Benfu drove the chariot, and Bu Guo was on the right. The horses were frightened and defeated, and the Duke's army was in retreat. The assistant charioteer gave reins. The Duke said, "It's the last divination." Xian Benfu said, "You won't be defeated in the future, but you are defeated now. You are not brave." So he died. The groom was bathing the horse, and a stray arrow hit the white flesh. The Duke said, "It's not his fault." So he wrote a eulogy for him. The scholars started to write eulogies from this time.
Confucius stood with his disciples, bowed and tilted his head to the right, and the two disciples also tilted their heads to the right. Confucius said, "You two are fond of learning, but I am sad because my sister is dead." The two disciples all tilted their heads to the left.
When a son serves his parents: if he advises them three times but they still don’t listen, he should cry and follow them. When the king is ill and takes medicine, the minister should taste it first. When a parent is ill and takes medicine, the son should taste it first.
Confucius said: "The Way is not far from people. If people practice the Way and distance themselves from others, they cannot be considered the Way. The Book of Songs says: 'Cut the wood, chop the wood, its principle is not far away.' Holding a stick to chop wood, looking at it from a distance, it still seems far away. Therefore, a gentleman governs people by their own way, and stops when he changes. Loyalty and forgiveness are not far from the Way. If you do not want to do it yourself, do not do it to others. There are four ways of a gentleman, and I have not been able to do any of them. What I ask of my son is to serve my father, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my minister is to serve my king, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my younger brother is to serve my elder brother, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my friends is to give them first, but I have not been able to do it. The actions of a mediocre person are cautious; if there is something that is lacking, he dare not not try hard, and if there is something that is more than enough, he dare not use it all; if he speaks, he will act accordingly, and if he acts, he will act accordingly. Why does a gentleman not have to be frank!"
Wang Xu often slandered Yin Jingzhou to Wang Guobao, and Yin was very worried about it and sought advice from Wang Dongting. He said, "You just need to visit Wang Xu several times, and when you go there, send everyone away and discuss other matters. In this way, the friendship between the two kings will be broken." Yin followed his advice. When Guo Bao saw Wang Xu, he asked, "What did you talk about with Zhongkan in private?" Xu said, "We always keep in touch with each other and have nothing else to discuss." Guo Bao believed that Xu was hiding something from him, and indeed their friendship became less and less, and the slander stopped.
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