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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
Zilu said, "I heard from the Master that in funeral rituals, it is better to have more mourning than not mourning. In sacrificial rituals, it is better to have more respect than not respect."
When Jianwen was the Prince of Xiang, he and Xie Gong went to visit Huan Xuanwu. Wang Xun was inside first, and Huan said to the king: "You have wanted to see the Prince of Xiang, you can stay in the tent." After the two guests left, Huan said to the king: "What do you think?" The king said: "The Prince of Xiang is the assistant, and he is naturally as dignified as a god. You are also the hope of all the people. Otherwise, why would the Minister of Pushe die?"
When Pang Shiyuan arrived in Wu, the people of Wu all became friends with him. When he saw Lu Ji, Gu Shao and Quan Cong, he compared them and said, "What Lu Zi said about a slow horse is that it has the advantage of being fast. What Gu Zi said about a slow ox is that it can carry heavy loads and travel far." Someone asked, "If what you said is true, is Lu the better one?" He replied, "Although a slow horse is agile and swift, it can only catch up to one person. A slow ox can travel a hundred miles in a day, but how can it catch up to one person?" The people of Wu did not object. "Quan Zi likes to have a good reputation, just like Fan Zizhao of Runan."
When Huan Xuanwu was the governor of Xuzhou, Xie Yi was the governor of Jinling. First, you should have a rough experience of being open-minded, and then you will find nothing unusual. When Huan returned to Jingzhou and was about to go west, he was in high spirits and Yi did not doubt him. Only thanks to Hu Zi and his wife Wang for understanding his meaning. Always said: "Huan Jingzhou has ulterior motives. He will definitely go west with Jinling!" Then he appointed Yi as Sima. After Yi came up, he still pushed forward his friendship with common people. Sitting in Wen, with his head bowed, whistling and chanting, there was nothing unusual about the day. Xuanwu always said, "I am the Sima of the outer region." Then he drank too much and neglected the morning and evening etiquette. When Huanshe entered the house, Yi immediately followed him. Later, when Yi was drunk, Wen went to the master and asked him to avoid him. The Lord said, "Without the mad Sima, how could I meet him?"
Kong Cheqi was traveling with Zhongcheng. They met Kuang Shu on the imperial road. He was accompanied by many guests, so Kong went over to talk with Cheqi. Zhong Cheng didn't look at it at first, and said directly: "Even if an eagle turns into a dove, other birds still hate its eyes." Shu was furious and wanted to kill him. The cavalryman got off the car, hugged Shu and said, "My cousin has gone mad, please forgive him for me!" Only then did he save the leader.
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