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Xun Fengqian and his wife were very close. In winter, when his wife suffered from a fever, he went out to the courtyard to cool himself down, and then used his body to warm the fever. After his wife died, Feng Qian also died young. Therefore he was ridiculed by the world. Feng Qian said: "A woman's virtue is not worth mentioning, her beauty should be the main thing." Pei Ling heard this and said: "This is a matter of excitement, not a statement of great virtue. I hope that future generations will not forget this saying."
In all the etiquette of servants, they must give the servants the reins. If the servant is of a lower rank, then accept it; otherwise, then refuse. If the servant is of a lower rank, then stroke the servant's hand; otherwise, then hold him down. The carriage of guests does not enter the main gate. Women do not stand up to ride. Dogs and horses do not enter the hall. Therefore, gentlemen should wear yellow hair, lower than the rank of ministers, do not gallop when entering the country, and must bow when entering the village.
The mourning period is lived in the hut, and the mourning period is not allowed to go to the hut for the whole mourning period. If the father is still alive, the mother is still alive, and the wife is still alive; if the mourning period is the period of Qisui, and the mourning period of Dagong Busui for nine months, they will not go to the hut for three months. Women do not live in the hut, and do not sleep in the thatched. After the mourning of parents, go home after the mourning; if the period is nine months, go home after the burial. In the case of public mourning, the great officials wait for the mourning, and the scholars cry and go home. When the parents of a senior official or scholar are buried, they should return home after the funeral. On the anniversary of the death of the deceased on the first month of the lunar month, they should return home to mourn in the clan. When the father or brothers are buried, they should return home after the mourning. A father is not inferior to a son, and an elder brother is not inferior to a younger brother.
Guo Zixuan was a talented person who could talk about Laozi and Zhuangzi. Yu Bi often praised him, saying: "Why should Guo Zixuan be inferior to Yu Zisong?"
Zhongni was at a banquet, and Zi Zhang, Zi Gong, and Yan were there to accompany him. They talked about etiquette. The Master said: “Stop! I will tell you three about etiquette and let you go around with etiquette to cover everything.” Zi Gong crossed the mat and replied: “May I ask how it goes? ”The Master said, “Respect without following the rules of propriety is called wildness; respect without following the rules of propriety is called servility; courage without following the rules of propriety is called rebellion.” The Master said, “Serving others takes away kindness and benevolence.” The Master said, “Master, you are too much; and Shang is not as good as that. Zichan is like the mother of all people, who can feed them but cannot teach them.” Zigong crossed the table and replied, “May I ask what you will do to achieve this middle point?” The Master said, “Ritual! Rituals are used to set the middle point.”
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