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Confucius returned first, and his disciples came later. It was raining heavily. When he arrived, Confucius asked him: "Why are you so late?" He said: "The tomb in Fang collapsed." Confucius did not answer., Confucius burst into tears and said: "I heard that in ancient times, tombs were not repaired."
Xi Sikong had a slave in his family who was knowledgeable about literature and had an interest in everything. Wang Youjun praised it to Liu Yin. Liu asked, "How is he compared to Fang Hui?" Wang said, "This is exactly what I want to do! Why compare him to Fang Hui?" Liu said, "If he is not as good as Fang Hui, he is just a slave!"
Sun Xinggong and Xu Xuandu were both famous figures of the time. Some people respect Xu's noble sentiments and despise his grandson's evil conduct; some people love his grandson's talent and eloquence and have no interest in Xu.
When He Pingshu's annotations to Laozi were completed, he presented them to Wang Fusi. When he saw Wang's annotations were exquisite and unique, he was amazed and said, "Such a person can discuss the relationship between heaven and man with me!" Therefore, he regarded his annotations as the Second Essay on Morality.
If it is abolished, there will be chaos. Therefore, if the ritual of marriage is abolished, the relationship between husband and wife will be difficult, and there will be many crimes of adultery and perversion. If the ritual of drinking in the village is abolished, the order of seniority will be lost, and there will be many cases of fighting. If the ritual of funeral and sacrifice is abolished, the grace of ministers will be weak, and there will be many people who forget their lives. If the ritual of marriage is abolished, the position of the monarch and the minister will be lost, the princes will do evil, and the failure of rebellion and aggression will arise.
Eat for three days, bathe for three months, and practice after a period of time, so that destruction does not destroy nature, and death does not hurt life. Mourning does not exceed three years, and mourning clothes do not repair, and graves are not built; on auspicious days, white harps are played to inform the people of the end; this is a rule of moderation. From serving the father to serving the mother, and love the same. There is no two suns in the sky, no two kings on earth, no two rulers in a country, no two masters in a family, and they are all governed by one. Therefore, when the father is alive, the mother should mourn for the same period of mourning, which shows that there is no two masters.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
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