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There are three reasons for not mourning a death: fear, disgust, and drowning.
General Wang wrote to the Prime Minister, praising Yang Lang: "Shiyan is a man of insight and reason, with hidden talents and wise decisions. He is not only a national talent, but also the son of Yang Houhuai. His position and prestige are quite low, but you are worthy of being associated with him."
Someone asked Yin Yuanyuan: "The kings and nobles of the time compared you to Pei Shudao. What do you think?" Yin said: "So you should be compared to Pei Shudao because you can see through the dark."
Sacrifice is a great thing, and it is a preparation for everything. Is it the root of education to follow the preparation? Therefore, the teaching of a gentleman is to teach people to respect their rulers and elders externally and to be filial to their parents internally. Therefore, when a wise ruler is above, all ministers obey; when the ancestral temples and the altar of the country are respected, the descendants are obedient and filial. Do your best and be upright in your righteousness, and the teaching will come into being. Therefore, when a gentleman serves his ruler, he must practice it himself. What he does not like in his superiors, he will not use his subordinates; what he hates in his subordinates, he will not serve his superiors; if he does not do it to others, he will do it to himself, which is not the way of teaching. Therefore, the teaching of a gentleman must start from its root and follow the ultimate, and sacrifice is it? Therefore, it is said: sacrifice is the root of education. There are ten relationships in sacrifice: the way to serve ghosts and gods, the righteousness between the ruler and the minister, the relationship between father and son, the distinction between the noble and the humble, the killing of relatives and strangers, the bestowal of titles and rewards, the difference between husband and wife, the balance of political affairs, the order of the old and the young, and the relationship between superiors and subordinates. These are the ten relationships.
Yanling Jizi went to Qi, and on his way back, his eldest son died and was buried between Yingbo. Confucius said, "Yanling Jizi is a person in Wu who is accustomed to etiquette." He went to see his burial. The pit was not deep enough to reach the spring, and he was buried in the seasonal clothes. After the burial, the seal was sealed, and the pit was covered with wide wheels, so that it was high enough to hide. After the enthronement, he exposed his left arm and returned his right arm to the enthronement and cried three times, saying: "Bone flesh and blood return to the earth, it is destiny. As for the soul and spirit, everything will return, everything will return." Then he left. Confucius said: "Yanling Jizi's understanding of etiquette is in accordance with it!"
From benevolence to relatives, the order is up to the ancestors; from righteousness to ancestors, the order is down to the ancestors. Therefore, the way of human beings is to be close to relatives. Respecting the ancestors means respecting the clan, respecting the clan means gathering the clan, gathering the clan means the ancestral temple is strict, the ancestral temple is strict, the land is valued, the land is valued, the people are loved, loving the people means the punishment is moderate, the punishment is moderate, the people are at peace, the people are at peace, the money is sufficient, the money is sufficient, all the aspirations are fulfilled, all the aspirations are fulfilled, the rituals and customs are followed, and the rituals and customs are followed, and then there is joy. The Book of Songs says: "If you do not show yourself, you will not be disgraced by others." This is what it means.
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