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A gentleman is one who is well-informed, strong in knowledge, and humble, and who is kind and not lazy. A gentleman does not exhaust people's favors or exhaust people's loyalty, but maintains friendship.
Zhuge Hui's eldest daughter married the son of Grand Marshal Yu Liang, and his second daughter married the son of Xuzhou Governor Yang Chen. Liangzi was killed by Su Jun, so he married Jiang Yu instead. Hui'er married Deng You's daughter. At that time, Shangshu Xie asked for his youngest daughter's marriage. Hui then said: "Yang and Deng have been married for generations. The Jiang family takes care of me, and the Yu family takes care of me. I cannot marry Xie Pei'er again." After Hui died, they got married. So Wang Youjun
Zhi Daoling asked someone to buy Yinshan Mountain from Lord Shen, who replied, "I have never heard of a nest. You went into seclusion by buying a mountain."
When Zhuge Liang camped at Weibin, Guanzhong was shaken. Emperor Ming of Wei was deeply afraid that King Xuan of Jin would go to war, so he sent Xin Pi as the military commander. King Xuan and Liang set up their camps across the Wei River. Liang devised all kinds of enticements and schemes. King Xuan was indeed very angry and was about to respond with a large army. Liang sent spies to investigate, and they reported: "There is an old man who resolutely holds a yellow axe and stands at the gate of the army. The army cannot leave." Liang said: "This must be Xin Zuozhi."
The general principles of all rituals are to follow the heaven and earth, follow the four seasons, follow the yin and yang, and follow human nature, so they are called rituals. Those who criticize them do not know where rituals come from. Rituals, good and bad, are different, and cannot be interrelated, which is derived from yin and yang. There are four rules for mourning, which change according to the situation, which is derived from the four seasons. There are grace, reason, moderation, and power, which are derived from human nature. Grace is benevolence, reason is righteousness, moderation is ritual, and power is knowledge. Benevolence, righteousness, propriety, and wisdom are all human nature.
A good singer makes people follow his voice; a good teacher makes people follow his will. His words are concise but clear, subtle but good, and rarely use metaphors, which can be called continuing his will.
In funerals, we want them to be relaxed; in auspicious events, we want them to be relaxed. Therefore, even if funerals are hasty, they should not be over-ruled; even if auspicious events are delayed, they should not be lazy. Therefore, if you are too noisy, you are wild; if you are too busy, you are a mean person.
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