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Chen Zhuangzi died and went to Lu. The people of Lu did not want to cry. Duke Mu summoned Xianzi and asked him about it. Xianzi said, "In ancient times, the officials did not finish their work. Even if they wanted to cry, how could they cry? Today's officials are involved in the government of China. Even if they want not to cry, how can they not cry? Moreover, I have heard that there are two ways to cry: one is to cry for love, and the other is to cry for fear." The Duke said, "Yes, then what should we do?" Xianzi said, "Please cry in the temples of different surnames." So he cried with the Xianshi. Zhongxian said to Zengzi: "The Xia Dynasty used Mingqi to show that the people were ignorant; the Yin people used sacrificial utensils to show that the people were knowledgeable; the Zhou people used both to show that the people were suspicious." Zengzi said: "Is it not so! Is it not so! Mingqi is a ghost instrument; sacrificial utensils are human instruments; why did the ancient people die for their own parents?" Gongshu Mu's half-brother died, and he asked Ziyou. Ziyou said: "Is it a great merit?" Di Yi's half-brother died, and he asked Zixia. Zixia said: "I have never heard of it before; the people of Lu wear Qisui for him." Di Yi wore Qisui. The Qisui of today is what Di Yi asked.
Women who are not in mourning for three years should not go beyond their fiefdoms to offer condolences. If they are in mourning for three years, then the wife of the ruler will return home.
Confucius said: "Guan Zhong carved a gui with red ribbons, a birch tree and a reverse altar, and a mountain knot and a colorful ash. He is a virtuous official, but it is difficult to be a superior. Yan Pingzhong worshipped his ancestors. A pig's shoulder does not cover the bowl. He is a virtuous official, but it is difficult to be a subordinate. A gentleman does not usurp the superior, and does not oppress the inferior. ”
Fan Yuzhang said to Wang Jingzhou: "You are a man of great talent and vision, a real talent of the future." Wang said: "Without such an uncle, how could I have such a nephew?"
Pei Sanqi married the daughter of Taiwei Wang. Three days after the wedding, all the sons-in-law gathered, including the famous scholars of the time and the sons of Wang and Pei. Guo Zixuan was present and started a conversation with Pei. Zixuan is very talented, but our first few friendships were not pleasant. Guo, Chen and Zhang were very powerful. Pei and Xu elaborated on what had been said before. Their logic was very subtle, and everyone present admired and praised them. The king was also surprised and said to the others, "Don't do that, you will be trapped by my son-in-law!"
Wen Gong mourned his wife, from his aunt Liu family, the family value is chaotic and separated, only a daughter, very beautiful, aunt to be a subordinate to find marriage, the public secretly has the intention of self-marriage, answer Yun: "Good son-in-law is rare, but such as Yu Bi Yun what?" Report Gu Yun: "Has found a wedding place, the door is rough, the son-in-law is famous eunuch, all not reduced." Because the jade mirror stand a piece, the wedding, the girl with her hand covered with a silk fan, stroking her palms laughed and said: "I suspect it is an old slave, if it is like this!"
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
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